Wise Bread (Ed O'Reilly)

The Secret of My Success

Ed O'Reilly — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 01:58:30 +0000

Why is it that a few people “get all the breaks” while most seem to be starring in their own version of “Groundhog Day” for the better part of their lives: renting themselves out by the hour, everyday, for enough to pay the bills, buy a few distractions from the dull throb of frustration and spend their time away from work trying to forget what they did all day?

Karma? Luck? A silver spoon? The hand they’re dealt?

I’ve written about the vanity underlying the messages in "The Secret" as well as the vacuum of materialism . Here, though, I want to present some basic steps that anyone can follow to realize their own definition of success.

When I was little, my dad was always saying things like, “A winner never quits and a quitter never wins,” and he would often quote Robert Schuller:

When faced with a mountain, I will not quit
I'll keep on striving until I climb over,
Find a path through, tunnel underneath,
Or simply stay and turn my mountain into a gold mine.
I will not quit.

As a child I didn’t grasp the enormity of these simple passages; but as an adult having to constantly adjust to change, I now realize that there are some not-so-secret ideas that are the keys to true success:

Know Exactly What You Want

Ask most people, “What do you really want in life?” (and I do this often), the answers are generally vague and what I’d call “safe”: “I want to be happy”, “I want a lot of money” or “I just get through the day.”

But what is happiness? How much is a lot of money? After you “get through the day” for enough years ... then what? Few are very specific to confidently assert exactly what is their driving passion. When I finally sat down to do this, it was a bit more difficult than I had anticipated and, to be honest, I’m always refining.

So, for example, you want a beautiful house. What kind of house is it? What color is it? How many levels does it have? Corner house or middle of the block? Carpeting or hardwood?

Bottom Line: Knowing exactly what you want is the only way to actually get it. Be specific.

Make the Plan and Write It Down

How will you get what you want in life? Whether it’s material comfort, a mate or true enlightenment you’ll need a map for getting from where you are now to where you want to be. It may seem obvious after you read it, but many people never take control of their own fate: they wait for someone to reward them with approval and recognition or, sometimes, with money.

Part of the map to reaching your goals is to do what you do best. Think back over time, make a list and don’t skip over the things that you think might be insignificant; what’s unique about you might be the key to your personal treasure.

Bottom Line: Journal what you want, including how and when you will achieve it. Write in the first-person present tense and use positive language.

Form the Group

Do you sometimes feel like the same person keeps appearing in various incarnations throughout your life, moving on from one relationship (friend, family, coworker, etc.) only to find that the next one seems like déjà vu all over again?

The people you associate with – particularly those closest to you – are, essentially, reflections of how you see yourself (and vice versa). When you are determined to achieve a goal you’ve set for yourself, you naturally tend to associate with people who will help you achieve this goal.

Keep in mind that the people you attract depends on your goal, and if your goal is one that is negative (i.e. harmful to yourself or others), so will be your associations.

Bottom Line: The people you choose – and who choose you – will be your Mastermind Group. You will collaborate on achieving common goals, sharing mutual desire and support.

Keep the Faith

I read about a guy who left his home in the Midwest to seek fame in Hollywood. He got work as a limo driver, a mover and the guy in a chicken suit who handed out flyers on the street for a restaurant. Undeterred by these jobs that were unrelated to his goal, he remained persistent in his desire to become an actor. He could have given up because the competition was too great or that he didn’t find fame and fortune right away.

So I wonder what Brad Pitt thinks about now when he remembers his beginnings.

Whatever you tell yourself about yourself is true; you are what you think you are, and life has given you what you’ve asked for. If you’re not satisfied with it, follow these steps to reach a new goal. And believe you will achieve it.

Bottom Line: The faith you have in yourself, and a strong degree of persistence, can determine when (or if) you reach your goal (see above quote from Dr. Schuller).

Some things to keep in mind as you are now on the road to success:

Don’t wait for the “right time” to start; the right time is now;
There will always be competition;
There will be failure, but they are merely temporary setbacks. You are still moving forward because you are persistent;
Some people might tell you, “You’ll never make it.” When you look back, you’ll see that those people are still exactly where you last saw them.

Reach for the stars; you just might get the moon.

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When’s a good time to buy Australian wine? Now. And hurry.

Ed O'Reilly — Fri, 05 Oct 2007 00:52:42 +0000

By Ed O'Reilly

When I first moved to Australia I noticed 2 things about the wine: there was a lot to choose from, and it costs twice as much (if not more) than the exact same Australian wine brands I’d bought back in NY. The selection is mostly a great variety from Australian and New Zealand vineyards, and the price is largely due to taxes. Thankfully, because of a glut in production, there was good wine to be found at a more reasonable price in cleanskins .

But now it looks like the days of the $7 bottle of wine are drying up.

Last week, I spent a few days in the Southern Highlands, where I tasted some excellent wine at the Blue Metal Vineyard. There, I talked to Chris about their wines and the state of how the years of hot, dry weather has affected both the quality and quantity of Australian wine, and also what the coming year will be like.

The drought has badly affected, among many things, the wine grape harvest, and there is speculation that the 2008 yield could be less than half the normal volume. This, naturally, puts vineyards in a position to better control (i.e raise) prices. But besides the expected price hike, it means that those tasty cleanskins will be unavailable.

“I like to think about the life of wine. How it's a living thing. I like to think about what was going on the year the grapes were growing; how the sun was shining; if it rained. I like to think about all the people who tended and picked the grapes. And if it's an old wine, how many of them must be dead by now. I like how wine continues to evolve, like if I opened a bottle of wine today it would taste different than if I'd opened it on any other day, because a bottle of wine is actually alive. And it's constantly evolving and gaining complexity.”
- From “Sideways ”

According to the Australian government, cleanskins are not available for export, so for my Australian mates: stock up now, while the cleanskins are still on the shelves. And for my International friends: you might want to grab a few Aussie favorites from your local bottle shop and hang on to them, as prices are expected to soar.

And despite the disappointing news about the 2008 wines, Chris assured me that Blue Metal won’t be raising their prices. Good on ya, Chris!

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The Not-So-Private Parts

Ed O'Reilly — Wed, 26 Sep 2007 01:09:44 +0000

By Ed O'Reilly

Raise your hand if you’ve never used Google or any of its services, don’t belong to any social network (including sites like Flickr, MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, etc.), don’t have (or comment on) a blog or never gave out any personal information online, like your name, email address, phone number, etc., in exchange for access and/or membership to a website.

Wow. That’s not many hands.

So, you willingly compromised a little privacy so you could post some photos, make new “friends” or keep a journal? Did anyone ask about your educational background? How about your sexual orientation or marital status? Your political views?

Is that your house I see in the satellite image on my screen?

Let’s safely assume that everyone realizes that any time you use a search engine, join a social networking website, or even post a blog entry – just to name a few free, common online activities – your opinions, preferences and other revealing details are tracked and stored for a variety of reasons, most (I assume to be) commercial in nature.

In other words, people voluntarily disclose personal information in exchange for membership or, at the very least, an online identity so they can search and/or network.

According to Heather Haverstein’s recent article in Computerworld, Pace professor Catherine Dwyer observed that “Users [of Facebook and MySpace] seem to view the social networking sites as a way to get online profiles, photos and the like for free while the sites ‘can take all their data and do whatever they want with it...’”

A marketer’s dream scenario

But who cares, right? You’re making and staying in touch with friends all over the world for free! Well, there must be money in all this somewhere because both Google and Microsoft have taken an interest in Facebook, particularly the valuable user-provided information to sell ads:

“Some industry executives believe the Internet today is facing the sort of turning point that the computer-operating-system sector confronted two decades ago: Whoever controls the technology platform for buying and selling online ads could hold tremendous power over the Internet industry for years to come...”

Facebook’s privacy policy says, among many things, that it “...may also collect information about you from other sources, such as newspapers, blogs, instant messaging services...” while MySpace (which is owned by Rupert Murdochs’ News Corp.) says that it “...also collects other profile data including but not limited to: personal interests, gender, age, education and occupation in order to assist users in finding and communicating with each other.”

OK, not big surprises there. But a little further down it states, “We use reasonable measures to protect member information that is stored within our database...[P]lease note that we cannot guarantee the security of member account information.”

So Facebook might be collecting information about me from sources other than Facebook itself, and the sprawl that is MySpace can’t guarantee that all my stored data is safe?

Even Google, despite its “call” for privacy standards, was ranked worst as far as user privacy; it is apparently “misunderstood” but was “working hard”.

I’m glad none of these companies are doctors performing brain surgery; no guarantees, “misunderstood” but "working hard” and marketing their services as useful experiences at the cost of a little personal privacy doesn’t do much to gain my trust, particularly in light of the news that Facebook is being subpoenaed over safety issues, despite “assurances made by the company.”

What You Can Do

It’s up to you how much you want to reveal online. Remember that cartoon from a couple of years ago: on the Internet, nobody knows you’re a dog;
Actually read the privacy policies and user agreements before clicking “I Agree”. It may be wordy, but you might decide that the site’s not for you. One website actually begins its legal section with, “Legal Mumble Jumble Ahead! Caution: Boring!!!”;
A few weeks ago Facebook announced that it will be opening up to search engines, which means that an abbreviated version of your profile will eventually be visible to Google, Yahoo, MSN, etc. To control this, you need to change your settings under the Privacy > Search area;
Sometimes websites require an email address to access information. If you’re not comfortable giving out your personal address, try Sneakemail or 10 Minute Email, whose developer notes that, “My server used to get around 200-300 e-mail a day. In the past week it averaged 60,000-70,000 e-mail a day. Virtually all of those were to old (expired) 10minutemail.com accounts. Presumably virtually all spam.”
Opt-out of letting the site you just joined share your information with third parties.

For your consideration, check out this short video about what Facebook may or may not be up to, and, just for the sake of balance, this viewer’s reaction .

A sinister conspiracy or just business as usual? As with how much information you disclose on the Internet about yourself, it’s your choice.

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Let ‘The Sun’ In

Ed O'Reilly — Sun, 26 Aug 2007 00:16:52 +0000

By Ed O'Reilly

I used to subscribe to a bunch of magazines, almost all being about a specific topic. When I moved, I cancelled each subscription… except one.

‘The Sun’ is a unique publication about a variety of ideas, issues and personal stories. Alive with sublime essays, poignant readers’ letters and enlightening interviews, it remains the one magazine I’ve looked forward to reading each month for over 17 years.

I first stumbled upon an issue that belonged to my dad – a voracious reader of spiritual, psychological and philosophical tomes – who was on a mission to find deeper meaning in his life. Rarely will I read a magazine cover-to-cover, but the material was so diverse and riveting, I was hungry for more by the end of the issue. Luckily, being the pack-rat that he was, he had many back issues I could peruse.

Eventually, I stopped being a such a cheapskate and got my own subscription, adding it to a small (but growing) list of publications arriving monthly at my apartment. For years the magazines would accumulate in piles of varying sizes (depending on my motivation to sift thru them) but after a while, of course, most needed to go out for recycling. By the time I was ready to move, I had whittled it all down to a small collection – but had every issue of The Sun since 1991.

Why does this one publication stand out, to me? I think the answer lies in its simplicity of how it serves up slices of life: its ad-free, subscriber-supported format is text and photographs from artists, writers and readers – a chronicle of each contributor’s experience of being human. It’s always thought-provoking, sometimes disturbing and often very moving.

By contrast, I find that most other magazines exist not so much to inform but more to create a need in you for something, then offer a solution (usually in the form of some kind of purchase on your part). Most “health” or “beauty” magazines (and, tangentially, others that address some niche like computers, dogs, bicycles, “celebrities”, etc.) contain articles that allude to a product you don’t have, but should. If the content seems to be driven by advertising, what does this say about the message in the articles?

To say that my life has gone thru a few changes in the past couple of years is an understatement. The stories in ‘The Sun’ help me keep things in perspective by reminding me that we’re all doing the best we can with what we’ve got.

It’s hard to find ‘The Sun’ in newsstands or bookstores, but you can get a sample issue for $5 (extra shipping cost if you live outside the US).

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Local Flavor

Ed O'Reilly — Wed, 22 Aug 2007 01:36:28 +0000

By Ed O'Reilly

It was time again to stock up on some things, and so this past weekend I went to my usual places: the fish market in Pyrmont (where one employee asked me how work was going since the last time I saw him), the bakery in Coogee (where the owner told me how the surf was that day) and a stop for a long black at one of the many sidewalk cafes with a great view of the ocean in Bronte. There, I talked to a couple sitting next to me about some places in NYC they might want to visit on their upcoming trip to America. I wrote down the address of a couple of my old favorite haunts and they were off with, “Cheers, mate!”

On Sunday, I took a short ride over to the farmer’s market on the grounds of Fox Studios for some locally-grown produce (gotta get there early), then went into Chinatown for some loose Gunpowder green tea.

Sound like a lot of running around for just a few simple items? Not really. I get out for a couple hours, the distances aren’t really an issue, the scenery can’t be beat and I save a little money on what I buy.

But more importantly, I mix and mingle.

The value lies not in what you buy, or how much it costs; the true value is in simply reconnecting with other people.

Here in Australia, “small” merchants have not been run out of business by large, impersonal corporate franchises and “super-stores”. On the contrary: the small, privately-owned shops thrive, most people tend to buy local and – as a bonus – people get to know each other.

The atmosphere of a true village is alive and well with the ubiquitous cafes, intimate regional restaurants and independently-owned shops and markets offering everything you’d find in a supermarket or mall – but includes the opportunity for a more interpersonal experience.

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Going Freelance: The Top 10 Tips

Ed O'Reilly — Fri, 27 Jul 2007 07:57:00 +0000

By Ed O'Reilly

So you made your move: you’re finally out on your own, earning a living on your terms.

No more commuting, no more answering to middle-management and say goodbye to bad office coffee. You’re the boss… and the salesperson, bookkeeper, janitor and receptionist; you’ll have to do your work and, in most cases, handle the other aspects of your budding business that – up until now – were handled by a co-worker at your last salaried position.

Congratulations, you’re now a freelancer, contractor, consultant, etc.

As a small business owner there will be various tasks for which you’ll be responsible and can seem overwhelming, at times. But, there are a few simple guidelines you can follow to make your time worth more. And that value can be measured by a combination of money and self-satisfaction:

Stay Organized

You’ll need tools for communication, tracking your money, writing invoices and managing your projects. One of the most comprehensive lists I’ve found that’s chock full of useful software is The Freelancer’s Toolset. Peruse the list but don’t feel you need every item; simplicity is best, so choose only what you need or you’ll just make more work for yourself playing with all the cool stuff;

Kill The Distractions

There will always be something you’ll think of to avoid starting a project, calling a client or doing paperwork. Even if you have a home-office, temptation lurks in every open newspaper, unkempt garden or messy garage.

And besides seemingly productive tasks like rearranging your sock drawer or alphabetizing your canned goods, the Internet will –if you let it – pull you in and drag you down. Your friends over at iMyTubeBlogFace will have to wait… you’re on the clock;

Set Aside Time For Specific Tasks

In a way, this is part of staying organized and killing distractions: you restrict your time for certain tasks.

Throughout the course of the day it’ll be tempting to send or reply to every email every few minutes, or chat with either friends or clients on the phone. But you are at a real job, even if you’re still wearing pj’s (yes, I’m talkin’ to you).

Unless it’s really important, most phone calls and email exchanges can wait until you have time to devote to them when you’ve completed your task. Constant interruption, spread out over small intervals over a workday, can add up to a lot of lost productivity and late evenings working to catch up;

Networking

I think everyone understands the indisputable value of this: no one knows you’re there unless you tell them you are. Join your business’s professional organization and attend some functions; also, sites like Ning and LinkedIn are just a couple of many online resources for making contacts.

Hopefully, you haven’t burned any bridges so keep in touch with ex- coworkers and, if appropriate, vendors. Contacting clients of your last employer, though, probably isn’t a great idea; your relationship with your ex-employer may prove to be more valuable in the long run;

Define Your Terms

You are a business, and, among other parameters that you’ve established, you have fees, you keep reasonable business hours and you have payment terms that keep you self-employed. Prices are (and should be) negotiable, time is flexible; but getting paid is neither of these.

Be fair with your clients, both with your prices for your service and with the time you spend working with them; but you need to get paid, and on terms you decide. Your clients should respect this or you won’t be in business for very long;

Outsource

There may be times that, to successfully complete a project, you might need to enlist the help of someone with an expertise that you don’t possess. In fact, sometimes the growth of a successful business is not measured by the hours you put in doing the labor, but by how you delegate work and manage various aspects of your project that can be handled by someone else;

Work With Your Client, Not For Your Client

Think of your relationship with your client as a partnership: you are an extension of their business, applying your particular skill to help them achieve their goal. You might be designing their web site, writing the copy for their annual report or handling their public relations; your goals should be their goals, because your success depends on their success;

Fire Your Client

A controversial statement? Maybe. But consider this: if you devote a lot of your time and effort to a client that has high demands but is never satisfied, what have you accomplished? I had a client that called me almost daily and, it seemed, gave me a lot of work. But at the end of the year, after having devoted myself to try and meet their expectations, I did a breakout of how much I earned per job from this client: it was far less than what I thought, and the reality was that it was only a few small- to medium-sized jobs I worked on, although it felt like much more when I considered the time I put in.

If you are spending a lot of unproductive (and unprofitable) time trying to please a client, it’s probably best for you both if you part company;

Do Your Work, Then Step Back…

… the only path to serenity. Wise words from Lao-tzu . If you’re passionate about your work, sometimes it can eclipse the reason you work and why you went out on your own: to have a different lifestyle. I’ve worked weekends, nights and even some holidays because sometimes there are unexpected circumstances that require you to make a sacrifice now and then to get the job done, and get it done right.

But no one says you have to work 14-hour days, 6-7 days a week; it defeats the purpose of quitting a salaried job to become an entrepreneur. Don’t feel guilty if you take some time off;

And The Last Guideline Is…

…up to you.

You decide what’s important, how you want to work and how you plan on meeting expectations – both your own and your client’s.

You started on your own for a reason; keep that reason in mind when you fill in this last guideline you plan to follow – it might be the most valuable one of all.

Other Resources:

SBA Small Business Planner
Determine Your Rate
Startup Journal (from the Wall Street Journal)
CentralDesktop

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Cleaning House With Dr. Bronner

Ed O'Reilly — Wed, 18 Jul 2007 08:26:01 +0000

By Ed O'Reilly

A few years ago, I noticed that, not only did I seem to spend a little more cash than I was comfortable with on cleaning products for my house, but I was having a sort of reaction to them: headaches, sudden fatigue and a weird taste in my mouth. At first, I wasn’t sure what it was; but I eventually made the connection between the various chemicals I was using around the house and these symptoms.

I started reading about some of the products and cases of compromised immune systems, skin irritation and respiratory problems in some people. Of course, I knew that furniture polish may smell “lemony” (or, to paraphrase George Carlin, doesn’t contain any actual lemons) but probably doesn’t make good mouthwash, and that bathroom cleaners will release a bunch of talking, mustachioed suds that will leave the room sparkling – but probably shouldn’t be added to my overpriced latté.

You get the idea.

I had 2 cats and lived near a busy street. I’m no Felix Unger, but I don’t like dust, grit, etc.

Cats + street = dust x (grit + dander).

So I typically purchased, on a semi-regular basis, disposable dusters, the aforementioned citrus-scented furniture polish, glass cleaner (why is it always blue?), bathroom cleaner, an “all-purpose” cleaner (for… well, I don’t know, actually. It just sounded good to have) and a few other things like air freshener spray and various laundry items. Sometimes I really went crazy and bought something to turn the water in the toilet blue for a month.

Wild times, I know.

I noticed that it added up to a lot, over time, so I started looking at the alternatives. A Whole Foods opened near me and I started shopping there, out of curiosity. Before anyone jumps on me about how expensive a lot of their stock is, I’ll say this: I know, I know.

One day, I picked up a bottle of Dr. Bronner’s Sal Suds. The bottle says that Sal Suds will clean everything in your house – wood floors, laundry, dishes, and cars. Sounded like a good alternative to the stuff I was using; but, really, it caught my eye because –surrounding the list of natural ingredients (each defined for clarity), various uses and pledge that it was not tested on animals – was written an entire philosophy of life.

Granted, the bottle seemed a little pricy for just one cleaning product, but I found that it would last me for, literally, months. Just a little bit mixed in water, applied using a spray bottle, will tackle just about any job. And, as promised, it did a great job on both my laundry and my car (even the inside).

I also checked out liquid soap for the shower and found that, not only did they smell great, but worked out, in the long run, to save me some dough that I’d have spent on whatever was available at the supermarket.

So, the symptoms I’d experienced were gone, I felt better about using products produced by a company that seemed to actually care about both the quality of its soaps as well as the well-being of its customers and, admittedly, reading the words on the bottles is actually very thought-provoking.

For both the uninitiated as well as existing fans of Dr. Bronner, hopefully you can catch the documentary that’s now being screened. Also, check out the NPR interview with the film’s director, Sara Lamm.

http://www.drbronner.com/

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‘Secret’ Attraction

Ed O'Reilly — Wed, 27 Jun 2007 10:23:05 +0000

By Ed O'Reilly

I finally buckled under the pressure to remain in the loop with Oprah and I rented 'The Secret'.

Now, before you think I’m going to offer a movie review, I’ll simply say that it felt like an hour and a half infomercial: the actors were amateurish and the quick-cut editing reminded me of 'America’s Most Wanted' with 'The Da Vinci Code' as the graphic theme. The panel of “experts” includes Dr. John Gray (of the 'Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus' fame who, it’s worth noting, was divorced after 2 years of marriage), Jack Canfied (author of the 'Chicken Soup for the Soul' series) and various other “visionaries” and “philosophers”.

But I really wanted to address the big “secret” presented in the movie (and the hugely popular book): that if you visualize what your really want and, to paraphrase Peter Pan, "think good thoughts”, you’ll have all that you desire, and in abundance since, according to one of their “experts”, there’s plenty of everything for everyone.

This concept of positive thinking is not new, obviously. I’ve read 'Think and Grow Rich' several times (as instructed in the book itself) and the message is essentially the same: set goals, write them down, imagine that you are already in possession of that which you want to acquire, etc. The book was written by Napoleon Hill and published in 1937 – long before Oprah had her book club. Still, the book was a huge success and continues to sell, largely, I would speculate, because people want to know how to get more out of their efforts and how to enrich their lives.

Both 'The Secret' and 'Think and Grow Rich' offer, I think, good guidelines for self-improvement: think positive, visualize your goals, use autosuggestion and have faith – either in yourself or in a "higher power".

However, both works (and, in particular, the film) seem to stress the goal of acquiring money and material possessions. They say, for example, to write down how much money you’d like to have and imagine that you are already in possession of that sum. The film illustrates its theme by portraying people buying cars and jewelry, of living “the good life” – all by following the steps that, as both claim, were (until now) privy to a select few of historically rich and powerful.

I was reminded of the New Age fads of the late 80s, right around the time of the stock market crash of 1987, a sobering event that punctuated a decade of big-ness: big money, big possessions and, sadly, big hair (you know who you are!). The New Age trinkets of crystals, rocks and Yuppie muzak promised “healing” and prosperity if used just the right way. Similarly, 'The Secret' supposedly reveals, with metaphysical allusion, the long-coveted way to a life of ease, of material abundance and indulgence, with little mention of the things that money can’t buy . Sure, it says that if you want to find that special someone so you can love and be loved, you have to send out the right vibe; but even this is portrayed in a way that is just one more acquisition based on your persistent longing for something (or someone) to make you feel more complete, to feel happiness. Ultimately, the bottom line is that you need something to make you feel, at all.

'The Secret' comes at a time where personal debt is at an all-time high and the concepts introduced promise that, if you just buy the book (and people are, in record numbers) or watch the movie (which is also available as an online pay-per-view), and follow the advice given, you’ll be on easy street. My criticism is that bliss will not be found with the next big purchase, or a windfall of money, because you thought about it hard enough. Satisfaction will come by believing in yourself and using your talents to find the deeper meaning of who you really are, inside.

I certainly encourage people to find a way to greater happiness, and I do believe that you are who you think you are; that the power of thought can change the course of your own life as well as the course of others, as has been demonstrated throughout history. It seems that what all these self-help books, films, etc. stress is that you are missing some essential component to your being. But I think what they’re really saying is that the missing component is their latest piece of advice, available now at your favorite bookstore or on amazon.com.

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Who Moved My Stuff?

Ed O'Reilly — Sat, 16 Jun 2007 08:54:00 +0000

By Ed O'Reilly

If you ever want to take stock of all that you’ve worked hard to purchase over time, and how much stuff you think you need to hang on to, go through each and every possession you own and decide what to keep and what to sell, or give away. You might be surprised at how attached you are to your stuff.

I’m, of course, talking about packing up and moving.

Moving requires that you take some serious inventory of your stuff… and of yourself. Because it’s not just about the things, it’s about your attachment to them.

You might find that after the dust settles from garage sales, selling through ads placed in the local papers and, of course, shipping your packages to your soon-to-be-happy eBay customers, parting with your black suede bean bag, your two coffeepots or the lawn gnome collection wasn’t so painful, after all.

Certainly, I’m not saying everyone should travel the road of Life like David Carradine in “Kung Fu”; there’s nothing wrong with keeping things that are unique and special to you, or are irreplaceable. Likewise, there’s nothing wrong with hanging onto some keepsakes and reminders of people, places and good (or bad) times.

But a material detox, like packing for a move, will bring you face-to-face with how much baggage you’ve been building up… and how much hard-earned money you’ve spent on things you thought would “make you happy” at the time, only to find that, now, you might not remember why you had to have it in the first place.

You don’t have to be packing up for a move to do this; just set aside a little time – maybe on the weekends or in the evening – to go through a box or a drawer. Look at what you are holding, and think about it: I have this; do I want it?

Many people are fortunate in that they have the luxury of acquiring a vast amount of things for later scrutiny, as I’m suggesting. Some have only the bare essentials, but harbor a desire more. And still others have very little, yet are perfectly content. While it seems paradoxical that the less-is-more principle could apply to some, but not all, I will stress, again, that the influence of advertising and television shapes values and priorities so that, despite a chasm in interpersonal relationships, the missive is to feel a little closer to complete with each new acquisition.

Moving On

I’ve read about a flourishing, worldwide group called The Compact that espouses the following ideas:

To go beyond recycling in trying to counteract the negative global environmental and socioeconomic impacts of disposable consumer culture and to support local businesses, farms, etc. -- a step that, we hope, inherits the revolutionary impulse of the Mayflower Compact.

To reduce clutter and waste in our homes

To simplify our lives (as in Calm-pact)

Basically, the members go for months – or even a year – without buying anything besides basic medical or hygienic needs and food (obviously). They barter or find things second-hand on craigslist.org, eBay, garage sales, etc. The concept is simple: buying more stuff is not the road to happiness.

I wanted to mention this group because, after you’ve cleaned house, inside and out, consider this core idea of escaping the tight grip of media influence and material acquisition.

In a sense, it’s like packing up, moving and starting anew.

The Compact Blog

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Do you have what you want… and do you want what you have?

Ed O'Reilly — Thu, 07 Jun 2007 08:30:59 +0000

By Ed O'Reilly

Sometimes, being frugal means not just saving money; sometimes it means not spending any at all.

I think we can all agree that there’s been a growing preoccupation with working more to earn more – so you can buy more; yet, it never seems like it’s enough, does it? Just a cursory glance at a landscape of malls, fast food chains and airplane hangar-sized “clubs” for buying sugary snacks in a container the size of an oil drum implies that this condition of over-consumption is reaching epidemic proportions. And yet, despite having a mountain of debt, people are still encouraged to consume as much as possible.

Frugality isn’t just about finding shortcuts to support consumption by saving a few bucks on your next purchase; frugality is also about simplicity, about non-attachment (or detachment, as the case may be) and about putting off impulsive spending and instant gratification.

The term consumerism, taken in some contexts, essentially means that people equate their possessions or their bank balance with happiness. It seems almost cliché at this point to say “everyone knows money can’t buy happiness” because, while people may say they believe this to be true, the behavior of the average citizen/employee/consumer/niche market doesn’t indicate that people mean what they meme .

“The things you own end up owning you.” – Tyler Durden

Sometimes, when someone says the “had to have” something, they might really mean it. If you expose an overworked adult (or even a susceptible child) to enough imagery and sound that imply there’s something missing in their life because they don’t use the ‘right’ deodorant, eat the ‘right’ breakfast cereal or have the ‘right’ toy (yes, folks, a Mercedes, a Rolex or an iPod are toys, too) and you’ll eventually get most, if not all, to buckle under the pressure to strive to attain more, to possess whatever’s being sold, at whatever the cost. Home equity line of credit, anyone?

And the “reward” for attaining their new possessions? Probably the envy of their peers (which, I assume, would be a marketer’s goal) or maybe a few seconds of, “Wow, that’s cool.”

And expect it to get worse.

In time, MediaCarts will be the norm, if they’re not already being used in your favorite House of Purchase. On the surface, it looks like it makes the shopper’s “job” easier; but, in fact, it’s just another information-gathering system that will monitor your movements around the store and try and target you with advertising to get you to buy something you might have overlooked.

Thanks, MediaCart, for pointing that out! Now I can spend a little more than I originally intended, but having a machine tell me what I need is like magic!

And don’t think you can just change the channel or radio station to escape the bombardment. Clear Channel will be selling 2- to 5-second ads – “adlets” – that you’ll hear before you get a chance to think about changing to another station.

"Seconds-long ads have turned up on TV as well: General Motors Corp.'s Cadillac and Time Warner Inc.'s AOL have used five-second ads. The TV world largely uses 60-, 30- and 15-second ads. Today, 30 seconds is the most common length for TV spots, but… advertisers seeking to get their messages out have been embracing other lengths as a way to stand out."
– The Wall Street Journal

I think that the work-earn-spend (and over-spend) cycle has not, in fact, resulted in more ‘happiness’ but rather in a condition of ‘Affluenza’ :

Af-flu-én-za n.

The bloated, sluggish and unfulfilled feeling that results from efforts to keep up with the Joneses;

An epidemic of stress, overwork, waste and indebtedness caused by dogged pursuit of the American Dream;

An unsustainable addiction to economic growth.

Think you’re immune? Take the challenge and see how you do. If you think you’ve got it, try Havidol and see if your symptoms improve.

The Bottom Line

The reality is that, aside from an elite (and lucky!) few, all of us have to go to work. In exchange for our time and labor, we get paid, and with our pay we put food on the table and we keep a roof over our heads. We might even shell out, in varying amounts, a few clams to amuse ourselves: there’s always plenty of things to see on TV, and, if you’re reading this, you’ve probably bought a computer at some point and are paying to connect to a vast amount of (sometimes conflicting) information available on the Internet.

With some of this, though, come visual or audio cues designed create a sense of tension, of wanting: “Why don’t I look like that?” “I want that car.” “ If I could just have a monster plasma TV, I’d finally be happy.”

The ad companies and marketers would like you to believe you’re not worth much unless you’re thinking about your next purchase. So, while you’re spending a lot of money trying to buy the illusion of value they’re selling, they’re spending a lot of money on trying to figure out how to get the attention of consumers whose minds are already supersaturated, daily, with hundreds of messages about their own self-worth and what life is really about.

But you don’t have to work yourself into the ground to own more stuff to feel good about yourself.

Go forth, my friends: be frugal and simplify.

More resources and information:
Maxed Out
The Corporation
Bernard Stiegler, "The Disaffected Individual"
Simple Living (from Wikipedia)
No Logo: No Space, No Choice, No Jobs

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