Is "Simple Living" Just Another Term for "Giving Up"? - Page 4

SouthShoreGirl · 09-21-2008, 07:46 AM

I am an older (well, early 30's LOL), frequent poster on another message board that is geared to 20-somethings fresh out of college trying to "find themselves" so to speak. Lately over there, more and more posts are cropping up from people in their mid to late 20's who have already found the successful, high-paying career, own their own home, nice cars, are married, may or may not have children, etc. etc. etc.-----who are depressed and complaining that they can not "see the point in life now".

With that said, I must say there is definitely something positive to be said for those of us who live a lot more simply than that. However, over there, some of them even turn their nose up at the notion of giving up what they have for "living simply" stating issues like "boredom" interfere if they are living on the opposite end of the spectrum.

Ultimately, I think life in general is what we make of it, regardless of how much money we have.

If anyone is interested in checking out this other site, the link is

http://www.quarterlifecrisis.com/forums/

I also find it kind of sad that there are people so pessimistic about their lives/ungrateful/etc.

Johansen8 · 10-09-2008, 07:43 PM

I believe in practicing frugal living most of the time and then splurging on something great every few years.

Pyrrha · 11-12-2008, 11:21 AM

I know I'm joining the discussion a little late, but you've all caught my interest. I'm particularly fascinated by the fact that no one has discussed the value of money, and the effect this has on the individual's approach of it. Several of you have mentioned that you left a more "luxurious" life for a more "simple" one because it is more fulfilling. That makes perfect sense to me, and I enjoy the same benefits. However, I do it for humanitarian reasons rather than to free up the time once spent with bills. I know that every life is valuable, and that it makes no sense for me to have a Hummer and three houses when someone else in the world must hold their child as (s)he dies of malnutrition. In fact, I don't see how I could ever enjoy having those things knowing that others couldn't even meet survival needs. It doesn't feel right to say that someone else doesn't deserve food, because I would rather spend that money on some unnecessary form of amusement.

I'm not saying that having nice things is equal to murder. I'm a college student, and that alone is a huge luxury that much of the world will never experience. I'm merely suggesting that some may do it as a rejection of the values placed (and those mis-placed) on money, not the hassle of the things bought with it.

FrugalNYC · 11-17-2008, 09:19 AM

@Pyrrha, I totally agree with what you are saying. I've read and spoken to many people who tend to complain about what they don't have, never realizing how much they do have. One good thing the current economic turmoil will bring is for many people to realize what they do have and hopefully appreciate it. Its very hard to convey such messages across all the world's population though, with the differences in language, education, money, and other aspects that creates filters for communication.

I have found that the more you learn the more filters you end up creating for your mind. That's why its so important to review your life on a regular basis.

lucille · 11-18-2008, 04:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SouthShoreGirl

I am an older (well, early 30's LOL), frequent poster on another message board that is geared to 20-somethings fresh out of college trying to "find themselves" so to speak. Lately over there, more and more posts are cropping up from people in their mid to late 20's who have already found the successful, high-paying career, own their own home, nice cars, are married, may or may not have children, etc. etc. etc.-----who are depressed and complaining that they can not "see the point in life now".
I also find it kind of sad that there are people so pessimistic about their lives/ungrateful/etc.

I hit that point for the same reasons in the past. Now that I had all of those things, now what? What made it worse was I really didn't have anything else in life. I no longer had things that held great meaning or were challenges and there is only so much satisfaction you can get out of work. I did nothing but work, take care of my kids, lather rinse repeat.
It made me take a harder look at my priorities.

Bruce Elkin · 01-11-2009, 05:37 PM

Hi, new member here. Enjoying the discussion. I've been living simply for most of the last 35 years, and mostly intentionally. I like to draw the distinction between voluntary and involuntary simplicity. I also find it's sometimes difficult to stay on the voluntary side of the line. I think I've erred in trying to get too close to it, and forget to create slack in my system, to reckon a kind of margin of error.
But old dawgs can learn new tricks, and that's my challenge, now. Cheers!
B.

mzScarlett · 01-11-2009, 06:13 PM

I was a hippie in my younger days & almost lost a job cuz I wore LONG skirts & dresses as opposed to the micro mini's which were the "style"; I remember my mother having a fit cuz we lived in the country with no indoor plumbing but there was a spring nearby: she said we worked hard to get inside plumbing & you reject it! you either buy into the BS that you MUST buy buy buy! or not; go into debt! When they gave out commodities I made out like a bandit cuz I made my own bread (still do & LOVE doing so!) used the "dried eggs" in cooking along with the powdered milk! Love to garden, & my favoritest thing of all is sitting in the warm sun with a cup of coffee or tea; Love to feed & water birds, butterflys & bees; teach kids about pockets; water paint with kids & paint a butterfly on them, then let them "paint" something on me; teach them to plant but my hands will get dirty! Oh, yes! Isn't it FUN? THATS the whole reason I love to garden & plant! I let others buy buy buy & then I go to Goodwill & Salvation Army & pay for what they don't want any longer cuz they want to buy more! I adore it & wore my full size mink coat over my patched jeans near ritzy hotels just to let folks KNOW that money is DEFINITLY not the only thing there is to life by a long shot! CHOOSING simplicity is a CHOICE; being happy whereever you are & whatever you are doing is one also! I lived by flashlight & a tiny lamp til I got the BEAUTY in lamps that I wanted. NOT just "functional"; but BEAUTIFUL; I got lena liu's paintings for $5 each after paying $80 for a wall tapestry that was woven; all are beautiful. The paintings are as beautiful as the tapestry & I also have zebras, elephants & giraffes; my home is full of things I love; does the PRICE matter so very much?

MNfrugal · 01-22-2009, 10:14 PM

Talking about people living in poverty... they aren't all living what we might consider a "frugal" lifestyle. I have friends who run a local foodshelf. One problem they have is that many of the people coming in for help/food don't want many items because they don't know how to cook. I brought donations one day last fall, and the volunteers BEGGED me to take some of the homegrown tomatoes that had been donated because the "clients" didn't want them.

I love my frugal lifestyle. Visiting my parents over New Year's, I had an incredibly fun time going through their freezer and figuring out what meals I could make from what they already had there. Seven of us ate well for four days without much shopping (other than milk, some fresh veggies, and a few other items). I left them with 24 jars of homemade soup (leftover from the lunches I cooked). My dad complained that I worked too hard on my vacation. I couldn't convince him that I really was having FUN!

For me, it's much more fun to live frugally, cook creatively, and save for vacation fun. I'd rather do that than make more money (which I've done before) and have less time for frugal fun.

redsoxmaniac · 01-25-2009, 06:14 PM

I agree it is fun to be frugal. Save that money for something worthy. It is also interesting about people not knowing how to cook or how to get the most out of fresh fruits and veggies. Kind of sad. I often wonder on how much a frugal lifestyle translates to a healthier life style. I am cooking a dinner for friends. It isn't super cheap but it is a pretty interesting gourmet type feed. It will cost me 14$ to feed 4. I am using some lettuce I grew for a salad and some herbs from my garden and a few other items from my freezer. I have a nice bottle of wine that I got on sale which would add $1 apiece per person. If we all went out we would easily spend over $150 for this same meal which would include a tip. Crazy. I'd rather enjoy the company, the experience of making this meal (which was fun) and not contributing to someone else's Mercedes

FruWiki Meg · 02-01-2009, 07:45 AM

"Giving up" is such a loaded phrase, just like "quitting". But there are many things worth quitting or giving up.

At the age when we start careers, how many of us really know what we want in life? How well do we know ourselves then? And how much will we change in the following years?

Is it any wonder then that some people change their mind about the value of big salaries and various job titles?

09-21-2008, 07:46 AM	#31
SouthShoreGirl Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Long Island, NY Posts: 110 Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Reputation: (13)	I am an older (well, early 30's LOL), frequent poster on another message board that is geared to 20-somethings fresh out of college trying to "find themselves" so to speak. Lately over there, more and more posts are cropping up from people in their mid to late 20's who have already found the successful, high-paying career, own their own home, nice cars, are married, may or may not have children, etc. etc. etc.-----who are depressed and complaining that they can not "see the point in life now". With that said, I must say there is definitely something positive to be said for those of us who live a lot more simply than that. However, over there, some of them even turn their nose up at the notion of giving up what they have for "living simply" stating issues like "boredom" interfere if they are living on the opposite end of the spectrum. Ultimately, I think life in general is what we make of it, regardless of how much money we have. If anyone is interested in checking out this other site, the link is http://www.quarterlifecrisis.com/forums/ I also find it kind of sad that there are people so pessimistic about their lives/ungrateful/etc. __________________ http://longbeachbabe.blogspot.com/

10-09-2008, 07:43 PM	#32
Johansen8 Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: USA Posts: 97 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Reputation: (10)	I believe in practicing frugal living most of the time and then splurging on something great every few years. __________________ Bad Credit Credit Cards Free Credit Repair Ebook

11-17-2008, 09:19 AM	#34
FrugalNYC Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: NYC Posts: 144 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Reputation: (17)	@Pyrrha, I totally agree with what you are saying. I've read and spoken to many people who tend to complain about what they don't have, never realizing how much they do have. One good thing the current economic turmoil will bring is for many people to realize what they do have and hopefully appreciate it. Its very hard to convey such messages across all the world's population though, with the differences in language, education, money, and other aspects that creates filters for communication. I have found that the more you learn the more filters you end up creating for your mind. That's why its so important to review your life on a regular basis. __________________ FrugalNYC My Blogs: FrugalNYC \| FrugalTech \| Twitter

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11-12-2008, 11:21 AM	#33
Pyrrha Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: United States Posts: 1 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Reputation: (10)	I know I'm joining the discussion a little late, but you've all caught my interest. I'm particularly fascinated by the fact that no one has discussed the value of money, and the effect this has on the individual's approach of it. Several of you have mentioned that you left a more "luxurious" life for a more "simple" one because it is more fulfilling. That makes perfect sense to me, and I enjoy the same benefits. However, I do it for humanitarian reasons rather than to free up the time once spent with bills. I know that every life is valuable, and that it makes no sense for me to have a Hummer and three houses when someone else in the world must hold their child as (s)he dies of malnutrition. In fact, I don't see how I could ever enjoy having those things knowing that others couldn't even meet survival needs. It doesn't feel right to say that someone else doesn't deserve food, because I would rather spend that money on some unnecessary form of amusement. I'm not saying that having nice things is equal to murder. I'm a college student, and that alone is a huge luxury that much of the world will never experience. I'm merely suggesting that some may do it as a rejection of the values placed (and those mis-placed) on money, not the hassle of the things bought with it.

01-11-2009, 05:37 PM	#36
Bruce Elkin Junior Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Victoria, BC, Canada Posts: 1 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Reputation: (10)	Hi, new member here. Enjoying the discussion. I've been living simply for most of the last 35 years, and mostly intentionally. I like to draw the distinction between voluntary and involuntary simplicity. I also find it's sometimes difficult to stay on the voluntary side of the line. I think I've erred in trying to get too close to it, and forget to create slack in my system, to reckon a kind of margin of error. But old dawgs can learn new tricks, and that's my challenge, now. Cheers! B.

01-11-2009, 06:13 PM	#37
mzScarlett Member Join Date: Nov 2008 Posts: 36 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Reputation: (10)	I was a hippie in my younger days & almost lost a job cuz I wore LONG skirts & dresses as opposed to the micro mini's which were the "style"; I remember my mother having a fit cuz we lived in the country with no indoor plumbing but there was a spring nearby: she said we worked hard to get inside plumbing & you reject it! you either buy into the BS that you MUST buy buy buy! or not; go into debt! When they gave out commodities I made out like a bandit cuz I made my own bread (still do & LOVE doing so!) used the "dried eggs" in cooking along with the powdered milk! Love to garden, & my favoritest thing of all is sitting in the warm sun with a cup of coffee or tea; Love to feed & water birds, butterflys & bees; teach kids about pockets; water paint with kids & paint a butterfly on them, then let them "paint" something on me; teach them to plant but my hands will get dirty! Oh, yes! Isn't it FUN? THATS the whole reason I love to garden & plant! I let others buy buy buy & then I go to Goodwill & Salvation Army & pay for what they don't want any longer cuz they want to buy more! I adore it & wore my full size mink coat over my patched jeans near ritzy hotels just to let folks KNOW that money is DEFINITLY not the only thing there is to life by a long shot! CHOOSING simplicity is a CHOICE; being happy whereever you are & whatever you are doing is one also! I lived by flashlight & a tiny lamp til I got the BEAUTY in lamps that I wanted. NOT just "functional"; but BEAUTIFUL; I got lena liu's paintings for $5 each after paying $80 for a wall tapestry that was woven; all are beautiful. The paintings are as beautiful as the tapestry & I also have zebras, elephants & giraffes; my home is full of things I love; does the PRICE matter so very much?

01-22-2009, 10:14 PM	#38
MNfrugal Member Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Minnesota! Posts: 92 Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Reputation: (13)	Talking about people living in poverty... they aren't all living what we might consider a "frugal" lifestyle. I have friends who run a local foodshelf. One problem they have is that many of the people coming in for help/food don't want many items because they don't know how to cook. I brought donations one day last fall, and the volunteers BEGGED me to take some of the homegrown tomatoes that had been donated because the "clients" didn't want them. I love my frugal lifestyle. Visiting my parents over New Year's, I had an incredibly fun time going through their freezer and figuring out what meals I could make from what they already had there. Seven of us ate well for four days without much shopping (other than milk, some fresh veggies, and a few other items). I left them with 24 jars of homemade soup (leftover from the lunches I cooked). My dad complained that I worked too hard on my vacation. I couldn't convince him that I really was having FUN! For me, it's much more fun to live frugally, cook creatively, and save for vacation fun. I'd rather do that than make more money (which I've done before) and have less time for frugal fun.

01-25-2009, 06:14 PM	#39
redsoxmaniac Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 133 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Reputation: (13)	I agree it is fun to be frugal. Save that money for something worthy. It is also interesting about people not knowing how to cook or how to get the most out of fresh fruits and veggies. Kind of sad. I often wonder on how much a frugal lifestyle translates to a healthier life style. I am cooking a dinner for friends. It isn't super cheap but it is a pretty interesting gourmet type feed. It will cost me 14$ to feed 4. I am using some lettuce I grew for a salad and some herbs from my garden and a few other items from my freezer. I have a nice bottle of wine that I got on sale which would add $1 apiece per person. If we all went out we would easily spend over $150 for this same meal which would include a tip. Crazy. I'd rather enjoy the company, the experience of making this meal (which was fun) and not contributing to someone else's Mercedes

02-01-2009, 07:45 AM	#40
FruWiki Meg Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Florida Posts: 64 Thanks: 0 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Reputation: (11)	"Giving up" is such a loaded phrase, just like "quitting". But there are many things worth quitting or giving up. At the age when we start careers, how many of us really know what we want in life? How well do we know ourselves then? And how much will we change in the following years? Is it any wonder then that some people change their mind about the value of big salaries and various job titles?