In Debt ? Who's responsible ?

[rorich]

Congrats to all who have gotten themselves out of debt or if you’re on your way out of debt. The question I ask here is who do you consider at fault for your past or current debt?

[moneymatters]

me. i got myself in debt. I got myself out. Some of the debt was "necessary" like school loan debt, while other stuff like trips, was just stuff i wanted to do.

Either way, i'm glad i'm out of debt now. its a nice feeling.

[Miss Rosie]

Don't get me started!

Am I aware that I'm responsible for the debts I have? Yes. Am I also aware that for most of them, the debt-free alternative was worse? Also yes. In two cases especially, not going into debt would have created serious problems. That money went for legal fees and medical bills, not toys. Am I aware that it could take over a decade to deal with all of it? Yes.

And there isn't a darned thing I can do about any of that short of winning the lottery.

[rorich]

Originally Posted by moneymatters

me. i got myself in debt. I got myself out. Some of the debt was "necessary" like school loan debt, while other stuff like trips, was just stuff i wanted to do.

Either way, i'm glad i'm out of debt now. its a nice feeling.

You know the funny thing is that there are people outthere who wont take responsibility for their debt? I know that I am responsible for mine and it is also my responsibility to get out of debt. I am in the process of becoming debt free, one creditor at a time.

[moneymatters]

i have a friend who just racks up the debt because he knows his father will bail him out every time. I wonder what he's gonna do when his father decides he's not going to do that anymore.

[mydebtquest]

Originally Posted by rorich

Congrats to all who have gotten themselves out of debt or if you’re on your way out of debt. The question I ask here is who do you consider at fault for your past or current debt?

For anyone who is in debt, take responsibility. I stacked up thousands of dollars of debt through college and shortly after graduation. Would I like to blame someone else? Of course, but who could I possibly blame for my decisions to spend money on credit? It is my responsibility, my fault, my doing, and I'm going to get out of debt on my own, through my own payments, and through my own efforts. No write-offs, no settlements, no excuses.

There are contributing factors such as aggressive advertising and misleading claims, but someone still had to sign for and accept financial responsibility of any debt.

[rorich]

Originally Posted by mydebtquest

There are contributing factors such as aggressive advertising and misleading claims, but someone still had to sign for and accept financial responsibility of any debt.

I can't agree more. I had a friend who blamed the credit card company for raising her interest rate. I told her this wouldn't be a big deal if there was no balance on the card. She never looked at it that way..... most people may not even take that perspective.

[Miss Rosie]

Originally Posted by mydebtquest

There are contributing factors such as aggressive advertising and misleading claims, but someone still had to sign for and accept financial responsibility of any debt.

No false advertising, no misleading claims, just the fact that disability in this country = poverty + added expenses. Had I not seen my doctors, I wouldn't be able to get out of bed in the morning. Had I not consulted a lawyer, my son would be stuck living with his stepmother, whom he hates, and his father, whom he no longer respects for having married her. I have added a child psychologist to the mounting bills, because my kid is developing anxiety attacks at his dad's, but because there's no physical or sexual abuse, I can't pull him out completely. Said father is refusing to pay child support because I'm disabled. That battle is now into its third year, and he's only paying partial support.

If I could get a normal job, I would. As it is, I freelance, but I must limit how much of that I do because the rules governing my pension are such that I cannot even bring us up to median income. There is a limit on how much I can make, regardless of what kind of work I do.

I'm trying hard not to declare bankruptcy, but paying this stuff off is murder, especially given that other things have fallen apart in the meantime. This month, I was afraid I'd have to choose between replacing a broken filling and repairing my car. God only knows what it will be next month. My son needs braces this year, because one of his adult teeth cannot come in without them, and another is at a 45 degree angle to the others. He's already been through surgery. Thankfully, he needs to lose another tooth first, so that buys me some time.

No, this isn't going nuts with the credit cards. It's not even student loans. This is the penalty I pay for having a disease that nobody has any control over. I didn't make myself sick. My doctors can't make me well. The law is such that my ex-husband was free to drop me on his terms.

The only thing that keeps me from collapsing is the understanding that I will always be in debt. As soon as I dig myself out of one hole, another opens up underneath me. I just keep moving forward as best I can, making sure to feed the debts and to make enough space for some fun, too, and some comfort here and there.

I'm hesitating to hit the Submit Reply button because I know how judgmental people get. I hear it all the time.

I also know how much people fear being in my situation, and they are right to.

[Jackie Arlen]

Originally Posted by Miss Rosie

I'm hesitating to hit the Submit Reply button because I know how judgmental people get. I hear it all the time.

I also know how much people fear being in my situation, and they are right to.

I want to give you and your son a hug. I think you're courageous for posting this but I think it can also serve as a reminder. It can remind those who have zero debt or a debt reduction strategy well under way of where they've been. And for others, they can see they're not alone.

And neither are you, alone that is. Take good care Miss Rosie.

[72Tiger]

Miss Rosie,

I don't know what to say that can help you, but your perserverence against all you a struggling with is very inspiring to me. Thank you for sharing your story.