Do you hide financial mistakes from your spouse?

[ModernTightwad]

The one time you don't tell him is the one time he'll look at a bill and wonder what happened.

You can actually use this as an icebreaker to start a better financial future. You can't spend the rest of your life afraid to discuss money because it will cause an argument.
- Hey honey, I totally blew it and I didn't upgrade our cell phone plan. I know it costs us extra and I'm sorry.
- After this happened I realized how easy it is to get distracted and make a money mistake.
- Maybe we can start sitting down every (week, month, quarter) to go over our finances and start a more cooperative approach.
- That way you can see where our money's going so you have more control. (Information is power)
- If I think I'm being heard I'll be less likely to fly off the handle when you do make an oops, and if we sit down you'll see some of the errors I've made so I won't sound self-righteous.

Sometimes we don't create an environment where the other person can own up to their financial oopses, and none of us are perfect; we all have oopses. In my own relationship I was tired of being the bad guy for coming down on my husband, and I was tired of making him the bad guy for messing up. After the above convo (which we had) we communicate better, and he takes a much more active role, but it does take time and a pattern of healthful words.

[lizzy_09]

Totally agree. Better to have 2 accounts. One personal account and one joint account. All our bills are settled at our joint accounts while those we use for personal use, we settle thru our personal accounts. I only show him the joint account and expenses we've incurred through the years.

[FinanciallySMART]

No one is perfect and I believe that it is best you sit down and inform your spouse of what had happen. At least he didn't hide things from you and you shouldn't either. Couples should always discuss financial matters whether they are marry yes or no. No I don't hide it from my spouse.

[moneymatters]

i would definitely say that hiding things like this from your spouse is not a good idea, especially if you want your marriage to be based on open communication, respect and love.

I'd suggest, if you're not already doing it - setting up a family budget, and having family budget meetings every month or so. At those times you can talk open and honestly about money issues.

Everyone makes mistakes like you've made, and you shouldn't feel like you can't share those types of things with your spouse.

Talk with him about it, you'll be glad you did - even if you aren't in the short run.

Lies and money
ten ways to improve financial intimacy

[lovely09]

Supposedly not.I learn a lot from a single situation where i tried to hide him one of our credit bills.It will result to nothing but an argument and luck of trust.So right now,we keep telling each other everything about finances and clear things up together.

[bhkyra]

Hide? No. That's asking for trouble.

Buy without asking after obligations are taken care of? Most definitely.

[SurferTiki]

That'd be pretty evil to keep that info from each other.

[SurferTiki]

I would never do that.

[Wayne King]

My spouse and I do not hide money issues from each other. My 1st wife did and as you can see that didnt end well. Nobody is pefect. It's ok to own up to an error or mistake to your spouse.

[kenyantykoon]

have you ever heard of the phrase "what you dont know will not hurt you"? it works. this thing have a way of soling themselves once ignored for long enough