Help someone pay down debt instead of giving them a gift, tacky? - Page 2

CFOontheGo · 12-20-2007, 07:16 AM

Our family gives cash all the time. But... the cash is givin without strings or instructions. Meaning even if the person is drowning in debt they are free to use the cash on whatever they want. Maybe some people think giving cash is tacky but I haven't received any complaints!

davoscat · 12-20-2007, 06:32 PM

But if a person is irrseponsible with money is it really a good idea to give them more cash?

I work hard for my money and I want to make sure it goes to a good cause. There is nothing wrong with dictating how money is spent as long as you have good intentions.

If you think about it aren't gift cards dictating where you can spend the money? If a Target giftcard makes you shop at target why can't you then with the same logical thinking give someone a debt giftcard so they have to spend money on debt?

Webministrator · 12-20-2007, 07:24 PM

Personally, I would prefer it if I got cash or my bills paid for Christmas instead of materialistic presents such as clothes, computers, etc.
I'm sort of in debt so it would be a big help and a gigantic weight off of my shoulders.

snakeeyes · 12-20-2007, 11:08 PM

if cash is too tacky a gift cert to target or walmart would be good. then i could get everyday items or cheap but stylish home furnishings. a gift should bring joy. i would hate to get a $100 bill with the requirement of paying down amex. i don't need that kind of nagging. keep your money if that's the case.

Webministrator · 12-22-2007, 09:41 PM

If I got a hundred dollar bill, I wouldn't want to pay off my credit card bill either.
I'd probably buy groceries or something though.
That or clothes.

Emily · 12-24-2007, 06:41 AM

If you're going to give cash as a gift, it should be with no strings attached.

My money is already committed to paying down my debt, and I would rather have the choice of whether to "splurge" on something on my wantlist or applying it to the debt.

Of course, I already have a good money-management plan in place, I'm not "drowning".

strive for the life · 12-24-2007, 07:02 AM

i never had in the past. but when my little sister graduated from college a couple of months ago i asked her if she had money on her credit cards, she said nothing too bad ( i know how much she had in loans and knew she must have had credit card debt as well) .

i handed her money and said i wanted proof of her online billpay receipt emailed to me the next day.

i did not think of this as tacky, and she emailed me that night. And even if it is tacky, no one knew but us, and I know I saved her interest.

mydebtquest · 12-24-2007, 11:07 AM

For my college graduation, my grandmother started a mutual fund account with an initial deposit, and for every birthday and Christmas makes a small deposit instead of sending a gift. It took several years before I realized the value of the gift, but that money is still there growing, I am finally contributing to the account myself, and now that account is designated our "house downpayment" account. Had she sent cash, I would have spent it, no doubt on completely useless things that would be collecting dust by now.

In my current situation, any cash gift that I might receive will immediately go towards debt repayment. Why? All I want for Christmas is to pay off my credit cards. My financial priorities have changed significantly since college, and to an even greater degree since I got married.

I don't consider giving or receiving cash as a gift at all tacky or impersonal - it allows the recipient to fully customize and personalize their gift. However, it also gives the gifter no control over how the money is used.

imagine girl · 12-25-2007, 03:00 AM

Striveforthelife, you sound like a fantastic big brother. I haven't been all that nice to my own siblings. Maybe your post will inspire me to do something nice for them in 2008.

Quote:

I am finally contributing to the account myself, and now that account is designated our "house downpayment" account. Had she sent cash, I would have spent it, no doubt on completely useless things that would be collecting dust by now.

What a thoughtful gift. When you get your new home and invite her for a visit for the first time I'll bet that's going to be a very touching moment.

frozemud · 12-30-2007, 08:07 AM

It seems that whenever I get cash as a gift it almost never goes toward bill payment or paying down debt, just because I usually pay bills from my checking account and that cash never makes it to the checking account. It stays in my wallet and I manage to fritter it away on vending machines, magazines, lunches and who knows what else within about a week.

If I get a gift card I'll usually think up something big that I might need or want. It just seems like more of a gift to me. Although it irks me to have gift cards from Walmart, Blockbuster, Starbucks, Regal Cinemas, Barnes and Noble in varying amounts all sitting there waiting for me to use them. Too much pressure! It feels good to use them up and have a clean wallet.

So in my opinion, is it tacky to give cash for debt payment? No, but don't expect the cash to go where it's supposed to go, and don't ask about it later. That is tacky.

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12-20-2007, 07:16 AM	#11
CFOontheGo Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: CA Posts: 23 Reputation: (10)	Our family gives cash all the time. But... the cash is givin without strings or instructions. Meaning even if the person is drowning in debt they are free to use the cash on whatever they want. Maybe some people think giving cash is tacky but I haven't received any complaints!

12-20-2007, 06:32 PM	#12
davoscat Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 61 Reputation: (14)	But if a person is irrseponsible with money is it really a good idea to give them more cash? I work hard for my money and I want to make sure it goes to a good cause. There is nothing wrong with dictating how money is spent as long as you have good intentions. If you think about it aren't gift cards dictating where you can spend the money? If a Target giftcard makes you shop at target why can't you then with the same logical thinking give someone a debt giftcard so they have to spend money on debt?

12-20-2007, 07:24 PM	#13
Webministrator Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 19 Reputation: (10)	Personally, I would prefer it if I got cash or my bills paid for Christmas instead of materialistic presents such as clothes, computers, etc. I'm sort of in debt so it would be a big help and a gigantic weight off of my shoulders.

12-20-2007, 11:08 PM	#14
snakeeyes Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 6 Reputation: (10)	if cash is too tacky a gift cert to target or walmart would be good. then i could get everyday items or cheap but stylish home furnishings. a gift should bring joy. i would hate to get a $100 bill with the requirement of paying down amex. i don't need that kind of nagging. keep your money if that's the case.

12-22-2007, 09:41 PM	#15
Webministrator Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 19 Reputation: (10)	If I got a hundred dollar bill, I wouldn't want to pay off my credit card bill either. I'd probably buy groceries or something though. That or clothes.

12-24-2007, 06:41 AM	#16
Emily Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 29 Reputation: (10)	If you're going to give cash as a gift, it should be with no strings attached. My money is already committed to paying down my debt, and I would rather have the choice of whether to "splurge" on something on my wantlist or applying it to the debt. Of course, I already have a good money-management plan in place, I'm not "drowning".

12-24-2007, 07:02 AM	#17
strive for the life Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 2 Reputation: (10)	i never had in the past. but when my little sister graduated from college a couple of months ago i asked her if she had money on her credit cards, she said nothing too bad ( i know how much she had in loans and knew she must have had credit card debt as well) . i handed her money and said i wanted proof of her online billpay receipt emailed to me the next day. i did not think of this as tacky, and she emailed me that night. And even if it is tacky, no one knew but us, and I know I saved her interest.

12-24-2007, 11:07 AM	#18
mydebtquest Junior Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Clifton Park, NY Posts: 21 Reputation: (10)	For my college graduation, my grandmother started a mutual fund account with an initial deposit, and for every birthday and Christmas makes a small deposit instead of sending a gift. It took several years before I realized the value of the gift, but that money is still there growing, I am finally contributing to the account myself, and now that account is designated our "house downpayment" account. Had she sent cash, I would have spent it, no doubt on completely useless things that would be collecting dust by now. In my current situation, any cash gift that I might receive will immediately go towards debt repayment. Why? All I want for Christmas is to pay off my credit cards. My financial priorities have changed significantly since college, and to an even greater degree since I got married. I don't consider giving or receiving cash as a gift at all tacky or impersonal - it allows the recipient to fully customize and personalize their gift. However, it also gives the gifter no control over how the money is used.

12-30-2007, 08:07 AM	#20
frozemud Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 50 Reputation: (10)	It seems that whenever I get cash as a gift it almost never goes toward bill payment or paying down debt, just because I usually pay bills from my checking account and that cash never makes it to the checking account. It stays in my wallet and I manage to fritter it away on vending machines, magazines, lunches and who knows what else within about a week. If I get a gift card I'll usually think up something big that I might need or want. It just seems like more of a gift to me. Although it irks me to have gift cards from Walmart, Blockbuster, Starbucks, Regal Cinemas, Barnes and Noble in varying amounts all sitting there waiting for me to use them. Too much pressure! It feels good to use them up and have a clean wallet. So in my opinion, is it tacky to give cash for debt payment? No, but don't expect the cash to go where it's supposed to go, and don't ask about it later. That is tacky.