Help someone pay down debt instead of giving them a gift, tacky? - Page 4

kav122 · 01-14-2008, 11:44 AM

I really don't mind cash, especially for my little boy because, come on, what does he really need? I told my mom to just give us cash for his 529 (thanks, Mark, for the advice) this year---even if it is only 5 dollars!

My problem when GIVING, however, is that I can usually find something on sale for really cheap (I write down three or four things that I think the recipient will like/they have mentioned that they want) and then look for it all year. I usually get by with about $10/person. I think that I would feel stingy/cheap, however, if I gave them $10 cash. Should I be embarassed?

Caitlin · 01-14-2008, 11:48 AM

I love getting either cash or gift cards! I don't think it's tacky at all.
I would talk to the person first, to see if they think it's ok if you attach strings to the money like "you have to put this on your VISA debt". They may think it's an awesome idea, or they may think it's insulting.

With gift cards, you just have to be sure to ask for ones from places you already shop! The majority of our gift cards from Christmas this year were for the gas station or the grocery store. It's not forcing me to spend anything extra; we'll have to spend money at those two places anyway, so it's great!

If you get gift cards for places you never shop at, you can sell them for cash or trade them for gift cards for places you do shop at.

My mom prefers to give gift cards rather than cash, because when she was growing up she was taught that giving cash was tacky. She wants to feel like she's buying you a gift, not just handing over some cash. For a person like her, gift cards are a great solution. I'm just glad I don't find cash tacky!

alex · 01-15-2008, 11:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ritter_Rote

I would not recommend helping people get out of chronic debt. I've found with family members that the second they get out of debt (through help or windfall, rather than working at it) they simply go into greater credit card debt.

Agreed. Help them with education instead.

It really, really sucks when you help someone, and a couple of months later, they're back in the same situation (but usually worse).

beansac · 01-15-2008, 04:53 PM

I think the best way to do this is in private, because in view of others it looks like you're trying to "bail out" your friend who can't help themselves.

On the whole, I think it's a great gift that... wait for it... pays dividends!

01-14-2008, 11:48 AM	#32
Caitlin Junior Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Posts: 23 Reputation: (16)	I love getting either cash or gift cards! I don't think it's tacky at all. I would talk to the person first, to see if they think it's ok if you attach strings to the money like "you have to put this on your VISA debt". They may think it's an awesome idea, or they may think it's insulting. With gift cards, you just have to be sure to ask for ones from places you already shop! The majority of our gift cards from Christmas this year were for the gas station or the grocery store. It's not forcing me to spend anything extra; we'll have to spend money at those two places anyway, so it's great! If you get gift cards for places you never shop at, you can sell them for cash or trade them for gift cards for places you do shop at. My mom prefers to give gift cards rather than cash, because when she was growing up she was taught that giving cash was tacky. She wants to feel like she's buying you a gift, not just handing over some cash. For a person like her, gift cards are a great solution. I'm just glad I don't find cash tacky! __________________ Clutter Cubed: Cleaning up, one day at a time. Thank you Wise Bread! I won a $20 gift certificate! Please help me spend it!

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01-14-2008, 11:44 AM	#31
kav122 Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Minneapolis, MN Posts: 435 Reputation: (181)	I really don't mind cash, especially for my little boy because, come on, what does he really need? I told my mom to just give us cash for his 529 (thanks, Mark, for the advice) this year---even if it is only 5 dollars! My problem when GIVING, however, is that I can usually find something on sale for really cheap (I write down three or four things that I think the recipient will like/they have mentioned that they want) and then look for it all year. I usually get by with about $10/person. I think that I would feel stingy/cheap, however, if I gave them $10 cash. Should I be embarassed?

01-15-2008, 04:53 PM	#34
beansac Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Chicago Posts: 32 Reputation: (13)	I think the best way to do this is in private, because in view of others it looks like you're trying to "bail out" your friend who can't help themselves. On the whole, I think it's a great gift that... wait for it... pays dividends!