So, I once saw a pirate standing outside my houde he was having a sword fight with a fire hydrent. He lost because he knocked that bolt off and got soaked with water. I invited him into my home. He felt threatened and drew his sord but i coforted him and gave him some sand to play with, of course he was delited with his home land and he thanked me with some of his booty (treasure). I have since cashed in the gold and bought the first pirates but yet to get the second.

So i went to see the Pirates of the Carribean: The Dead Man's chest with a couple of my friends because of our love for pirates. As we were entering into the theater, the lights dimmed and all of a sudden a shadow engulfed the screen, blocking any light. We heard a loud "ARRGH," followed by a "SURRENDER YE BOOTY" as ten pirates swung from the ceiling in front of us. Now as a charter member of the Pirate Protection Agency (PPA), I had to do something about this. Though i love pirates, i know i needed to protect my friends from harm. With my pirate defense training, i started fighting the pirates. Luckily, i carried my sword with me. I battled for half an hour, swords clinging left and right, until the pirates realized they were not strong enough to defeat me. So in a last ditch attempt, they cut the screen down the middle, ruining it. I was angered by this, so I chased after the pirates, but unfortunately these pirates drove expensive sports cars they bought with their stolen booty. My Camry was no match for them. As we returned to the theater, the attendant told us they were not going to show the movie anymore because it posed a great risk for another pirate attack. So i would like the DVD so i can watch the movie in the safety of my home, free from any pirate raids.

I am in need of a good coaster and the Cars DVD would suffice.

(actually i like the movie and am too cheap to buy a kid's movie and admit that i am immature)

When I was a child, our family car was named Puff the Tragic Wagon.

It was a school-bus yellow 1974 toyota pickup with a muffler that was held on with coat hangers and wire. You had to drive with all the windows down in the dead of winter because the whole thing stank like gas. You could hear it coming a mile away. When my mom would pick me up from school, all the children would point and laugh at me before it even rounded the corner, because they could hear it coming, ka-THANG ka-THANG ka-thuck thuck thuck.

If I get a free DVD out of this story, it will make all my childhood humiliation amount to something.

Can I have Cars please?

When I was three and riding with my dad in his VW, he had to come to a sudden stop. I'm not sure how it happened because, like, I was only three, but I have an inch-long scar on my nose. My parents told me that my nose was nearly ripped off, and that the small scar on the side of my nose once went almost all of the way around. The doctor who stitched me up did a terrific job and, until I tell you that it's there, you probably won't notice it. I'm not making this up... It really happened and I have the scar to prove it.

When I was about 5, I jumped over the rim in the above-ground 30" deep pool my parents had bought us, and I kept my face from hitting the bottom by jamming my hand on a wind-up metal sea-plane. I came up and watched as my hand turned from wet with a red streak into nearly solid red from hand to elbow. Mother went a bit hysterical, then pulled herself together and took me to the hospital. Seven stitches on that one.

When I was 7 and riding my bike on the sidewalk, a neighbor came zooming out of his garage and down his steeply inclined driveway, knocking me over and cutting a deep gash in the top part of my foot. I walked home leaving a trail of bloody prints of my right foot. I was pretty calm about it and asked my dad to get me something to stop my foot from bleeding. He asked me, "Do want a band-aid?" I said, "No... I don't think we have any band-aids big enough." My grandparents were there at the time and I never saw such confusion as everybody tried to do everything at once. Fourteen stitches.

When I was 11, I went through a glass shower door, getting slashed both going in and pulling myself out. I even got another one when I sat down to recover from having been sliced and diced. I screamed bloody murder. Mother, cooking in the kitchen, sent my youngest sister to see what was wrong. I was naked and I did not want my sister to see me naked, so I stuck my arm out the door. It was sopping wet with blood and there was a large shard of glass protruding from it. My little sister went ape-shit and ran through the house, shrieking like she'd just been branded. My mother decided that she had best investigate in person. When she got there, she went white as a klansman's hood and looked like she was going to lose it. She didn't, though, and started wrapping towels around the wounds that did not have obvious pieces of glass sticking out of them. She sent the middle sister across the street to get the help of the retired Marine Colonel. He came at once--I had somehow splattered blood on her leg, so he caught the sense of urgency despite my sister's self-reported incoherence. They carried me out to the street naked. I was less mortified by the blood streaming from seven large wounds on my body than by having my nakedness paraded before the entire neighborhood and my naked butt put on the grass. He ran across the street to get his Lincoln with white leather seats. He put me in the back seat and told my mother to sit with me while he drove to the hospital. I tried to make light of the situation, saying, "I guess I'm gonna miss football practice tomorrow." My mother did not understand and asked me to repeat it. When I did, she stuck her head out the window and barfed. Some people have no sense of humor. That was 117 stitches on the outside with a large number of things stitched up on the inside. In removing the stitches on my back, the doctor (who had not done the neat, careful stitching of the others) left part of one stitch in my back. I kept complaining about the itch until my mother took me back to see a doctor at the hospital. He probed around a little, finally found the small bit of stitching and pulled it free, coated with a yucky yellow-brown layer of necrotic tissue. For some reason, I still frequently have an itch there 38 years later.

By the way, the Marine would not even let my parents pay to have his car cleaned. A real class act, he was. Pretty much every Marine I have met has been that way.

Since then, I fell down a trail at Scout camp (7 stitches), caught one of those old metal fans as it toppled (5 stitches), and blew off getting stitches in a cut on my face, leaving me with a mildly roguish scar near my eyebrow. I also have burn scars on my legs and a large, deep-puckered scar from back surgery. The scars from my vasectomy are too small to worry about, and most people don't even notice them at all. The same for the scars from having my wisdom teeth removed, although I have never had anyone ask to see those, whereas some women do want to see the vasectomy scars. Given that some women are fascinated by my vasectomy scars, I have tried the pick-up line of, "Hey... Wanna see my vasectomy scars?" It worked once, even though she'd already seen them. Some women are just fixated on testicle surgery, I guess.

So. That's why I think you should give me the Scars movie. Hopefully, when I think of the klutzy things I have done and all of the little reminders that life has written on my flesh, it will help to give me a sense of humor about it all, and not blow it out of proportion.

I would very much like Pirates 2 because I never got to see all of it at the theater. My boyfriend and I went to see it at a theater we had never been to before. The nice thing about this theater was that it had a bar. We spent some time at the bar before going in to see the movie. We must have been drinking too much because we walked into the wrong movie and never realized it. We accidentally walked into an earlier showing of Pirates which had already been playing for an hour. Seeing that the movie had started we figured we had only missed the first few minutes or so. Throughout the movie we were very confused since we had missed the events of the first hour. I kept wondering why Keira Knightley was dressed up like a boy (???). It was still great though! We left the theater happy and didn’t realize anything was wrong until the next day when we were talking about how “short” it had been. Not a very crazy story but it made us laugh our butts off afterwards. We don’t get out much really.

Keira Knightley, nuff said.

Why would someone enter such a drawing? Because, for the first time, I'd be happier with the runner's up prize. Heh.

They're both good DVDs and I might watch it once or twice, but I would pretty much sell it and make a few dollars. That's not as noble as donating it to my alma mater's video collection, but on the other hand the sooner I get out of debt the sooner I can donate to my alma mater's capital campaigns!

I actually don't own many DVDs, just because I could never part with the money for them. I usually used said money on useless things like food. : (

I've been ridiculed for too long for not having Pirates of the Caribbean in my [already pitiful] inventory of DVDs, and I'd love to rub peoples' faces in a brand-new, glorious Pirates DVD.

Also, the Pirates sequel had just come out when I was visiting California during the summer. I remember going to a beach there, and we chose a fire pit next to a bunch of pirates. Because of that, every time I see PoTC, I think of those pirates on the beach, roasting sausages on a stick or playing volleyball. It's a pretty great mental image of Jack Sparrow.

Hi.
I do not deserve Any of these dvds as i am a horrible annoying person. but hey. you have to be in it to win it. But on the offchance, in case i am lucky to win one then it would have to be CARS as we already have pirates2 and my kids would LOVE cars. Especially my little boy.

i want cars because i want to be a drivers ed teacher and cars would be fun to teach with. those cars are fast, and so do i. yay!

I desperately need a birthday gift for my 3 year old nephew. "Cars is his absoleute favorite! Thanks!
Fallen on hard times in Illinois