Ring. Ring. Ka-ching! Lying About Your Telephone Tax

I haven't had a landline in years. I'm dead serious. Years.

So, I was bummed to hear that this year, the "sorry you were cheated initially when we taxed you too much" refund that we get back is for long distance telephone service.

Apparently, Americans who paid for long distance calling plans were cheated or something. By Ma Bell? Or the Baby Bells? Uncle Sam in conjunction with the Bell Family? It doesn't matter now. What matters is that, when you file your taxes this year, you can get back between $30 and $60, depending on the number of exemptions you claim.

Whoop-tee-doo. Thanks, Uncle Sam. I've been using only my pay-as-you-go cell phone for years, carefully tracking my usage, and this is how you repay my mobile monetary frugality?

Now, it's true that some cell phone plans do qualify for the tax refund (thanks, Clever Dude). It just so happens that mine does not. I never paid this tax, and thus, I don't qualify.

However, a friend of mine who works for H&R Block told me that anyone can pretty much claim this refund. Because the IRS isn't going to audit it. Which is awesome, because I already filed my taxes, and I didn't claim it, because I was sure that somehow, THE IRS WOULD KNOW.

It turns out that they don't really care. So, go ahead, claim it, even if you are an off-the-grid type who doesn't even HAVE a phone. Just don't get too greedy, or they might decide not to pay everyone their $60.

Some of you may ask if I am advocating that people cheat on their taxes. And yes, I guess I am. Just a little. Most people qualify for this refund, but those who don't might as well go ahead and try to get it, too.

I'm putting the "bread" in Wise Bread. Not necessarily the "wise", though.