likeable

6 Easy Tricks to Become Instantly More Likeable

Brittany Lyte — Fri, 12 Sep 2014 15:00:08 +0000

Some people attract new friends and opportunities like a magnet. It's in their DNA. (See also: 12 Things You Need to Stop Doing Today to Be a Better Friend)

But likability can also be learned by about 90% of people, according to Rohit Bhargava, author of Likeonomics. The benefits are astounding: better relationships, stronger networks, more career success. That's because people want to be in the company of likable people. And they want to help them out.

And we want to help you out, so read on for six simple tricks to grow your appeal and charisma.

1. Raise Your Eyebrows and Turn the Corners of Your Lips Up

People who seem honest and trustworthy are well-liked and it all boils down to the shape and features of the face. People with square jaws, broad chins, high cheekbones, full lips, and brown eyes tend to be perceived as genuine and therefore more likeable.

"Whether we like it or not, previous well-documented research has shown that people tend to perceive certain personality characteristics or traits in individuals based on the structure of their face," said Daniel Gill of the Institute of Neuroscience and Psychology at the University of Glasgow. "This means some people can be judged to be untrustworthy or domineering simply by how they look — a square jaw and large brow conveying dominance, for example. It can have implications for things like mate selection and job opportunities."

But if anatomy isn't in your favor, there's a simple facial expression you can employ to boost your appearance of trustworthiness: raise your eyebrows and curl your lips into a slight smile. Researchers say people who activate this expression on their face are more likely to win the affections of people they encounter.

2. Smile Only When It's Genuine

Research shows that a spontaneous smile engages certain muscles around the eyes that aren't triggered when a person flashes a courtesy smile. That means a genuine smile has greater social currency than a forced one because other people can actually detect whether it's authentic or fake.

3. If You're a Woman, Wear Makeup

Harvard researchers found that women who wear makeup are perceived to be more confident, competent, and attractive. In a word: likeable. Sarah Vickery, a Procter and Gamble scientist who helped author the study, explained to the New York Times that cosmetics "can significantly change how people see you, how smart people think you are on first impression, or how warm and approachable, and that look is completely within a woman's control, when there are so many things you cannot control." All it takes is a coat of blush, lip gloss, and a whisk of mascara.

4. Make Good Eye Contact

One of the most effective ways to connect with another person is to look them in the eyes. It's a major cue that you're present, listening, genuinely interested, and honest in your own remarks. Failure to look another person in the eyes, on the other hand, is an indicator of untrustworthiness, embarrassment, and an overall lack of confidence. These are qualities you'll want to steer clear from on your journey to becoming more charismatic.

5. Don't Sit With Your Arms and Legs Crossed

People who take on relaxed resting poses that occupy a great amount of space are generally perceived as powerful, which is an attribute other people tend to be attracted to since the human brain equates power to competence. Not only that, but research shows that people who take on expansive, open poses aren't just perceived as being more powerful — they actually begin to feel more powerful, too. So stand tall, stretch your shoulders back, and resist the urge to pull your arms in tight against your torso. You are important, so don't be afraid to take up space.

6. Help Others — No Strings Attached

Adding value to other people's lives is really quite simple. And it can go a long way to help you organically grow your network of acquaintances and friends. So connect friends with friends who can help one another achieve a common goal. Lend out the lawnmower. Pick up an acquaintance from the airport. The key is this: Don't expect or ask for anything in return. The favors and help you dole out will come back to you down the road when you need them.

How do you make yourself more likeable? Please share in comments — we'll like you if you do!

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This article is from Brittany Lyte of Wise Bread, an award-winning personal finance and credit card comparison website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:

Best Money Tips: Things Extremely Likeable People Do

Ashley Jacobs — Wed, 25 Jun 2014 19:00:03 +0000

Welcome to Wise Bread's Best Money Tips Roundup! Today we found some awesome articles on things extremely likeable people do, ways to make money at the bar, and cheaper vacation planning.

6 Easy Ways to Be More Likable

Kelly Medeiros — Wed, 30 Apr 2014 09:48:19 +0000

As people, we all have a basic need to feel liked. But you don't need to be a glamorous celebrity or the most interesting man in the world to have people adore you. Often, it's just the simple things that can make a real difference. Here are some easy skills that anyone can use to instantly win over others, and also feel good in the process. (See also: How to Be Happier and More Likeable at Work)

1. Ask Questions of Interest

If you've ever watched reality dating shows, you know that nobody likes the people who only talk about themselves the whole time. This certainly holds true for life in general; however, we are programmed to talk about ourselves, given it positively affects our brain chemistry. But knowing this, you can instantly boost your likeability when you turn the tables and start asking someone thoughtful questions about themselves to get them talking. Truly listening will only enhance the effect and make people feel important. It's a simple strategy, but one that is often overlooked if you accidentally or purposefully get too focused on yourself. (See also: Improve Any Conversation With a Simple Listening Tactic)

2. Remember Names

Always remembering someone's name can instantly create some goodwill, especially with developing relationships. Same thing goes for remembering other details for that matter. Recalling things like where someone is from, kids' names, or other pertinent details, shows you care and creates a great impression. In fact, the best salespeople often follow such strategies to personalize relationships and win over clients. The Internet is awash with advice on learning to remember names, but start with some basics:

Repeat the name after you learn it;
Spell it out;
Associate it with a context ("Bill from Accounting");
Actually care enough to remember.

3. Pay a Genuine Compliment

Who doesn't appreciate a good compliment? Saying something nice to someone is a great way to relate and have people like you. But before you throw out the praise, be sure to make it thoughtful and genuine. Fake compliments are obvious, and kissing up can do just the opposite of what you're intending. Look for things truly worth noting. It can be as simple as telling someone you love the shoes he is wearing today to more personal accolades, like remarking how someone always so fun to talk to. Such kindness resonates with people, and they will associate you with the good feelings it gives. (See also: 5 Tips to Giving Better Compliments)

4. Be Approachable

People gravitate towards those that look approachable. Doing something as easy as smiling can illicit a positive response and make people find you more likeable. Negative body language, like scowling, folding arms, and looking closed off does just the opposite. With approachability comes your ability to also approach others in a positive way. Doing so sends a pleasant message and looks like you care. Just avoid the over-aggressive approach, or worse yet, in certain social situations, using bad pickup lines. (See also: Improving Your Body Language)

5. Use Humor

Beyond an approachable demeanor, having a sense of humor can be an effective tool in getting people to like you. Just be sure you use the right kind of humor, which means not being offensive and only using neutral targets or things you have in common. I often find my humor is aimed at myself. Some may call it self-deprecating, but it's more of a way to find common ground with others and lighten the mood. Humor can help in many ways, as it makes you more enjoyable to be around, diffuses tension, and puts people at ease, just to name a few benefits.

6. Share Something About Yourself

Sharing something about yourself with others makes you more relatable and can give people the chance to make an instant connection or even commiserate with you. Sharing personal details doesn't have to be about heavy or life-altering things, however. Try starting out with the smaller stuff, like mentioning an interest or favorite place, which is easy to share and ultimately can strike a chord with someone. People love it when others end up having something in common with them. And, even if what you share isn't a mutual thing, it can still make you seem more down to earth or interesting when you open up.

What are some other helpful skills that you can add to the list? Start by sharing something in comments!

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This article is from Kelly Medeiros of Wise Bread, an award-winning personal finance and credit card comparison website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:

likeable

6 Easy Tricks to Become Instantly More Likeable

1. Raise Your Eyebrows and Turn the Corners of Your Lips Up

2. Smile Only When It's Genuine

3. If You're a Woman, Wear Makeup

4. Make Good Eye Contact

5. Don't Sit With Your Arms and Legs Crossed

6. Help Others — No Strings Attached

Like this article? Pin it!

Best Money Tips: Things Extremely Likeable People Do

Top 5 Articles

Other Essential Reading

6 Easy Ways to Be More Likable

1. Ask Questions of Interest

2. Remember Names

3. Pay a Genuine Compliment

4. Be Approachable

5. Use Humor

6. Share Something About Yourself

Like this article? Pin it!