FREE DVD - Pirates 2 or Cars.


Ok, this one is for all you Wisebread readers with a sense of humor and a few empty spaces in your DVD collection. I have 1 brand new, sealed widescreen DVD each of Pirates Of The Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest and Disney/Pixar's cars.

I was given these, I already own them and I thought, hey, why not have some fun with them. And give my Wisebread readers a chance to win them as part of the deal. So, here's the game.

Just tell me a funny, ridiculous or insane reason as to why you want either DVD and you may just get it. As I have done before, leave your entry as a comment in the box below, and be sure to give us your email address (it's kept private, you won't get junk mail). We need it to contact the winner of each DVD.

As usual, I will confer with my esteemed Wisebread writers as to who wins the DVDs. You have until April 30th at Midnight to get your entries in. Anything goes (keep it clean) and the one that makes us laugh our socks off wins. I have a couple of runner-up prizes as well. 2 Pirates T-Shirts (both 2XL, sorry, that's all I have, but if that be yer size, they be great cap'n).

Over to you guys. Make me chuckle. And seeing as how the most comments we've ever received for a post was about 80, your chances of winning are exceptionally high!

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Guest's picture

I want the Cars DVD just because I don't wanna give Disney and money for being bastards by making me double dip by getting a 2-disc cars dvd set later on down the track just because they are greedy and although I am a shareholder I don't care because they are greedy and mean and you should have pity on those who aren't fortunate enough for any reason you may put up and i am running out of breath typing this so I might just, in George's words from the 4th series of blackadder, "Go and kill myself until it bloody well hurt". Thankyou and I'm here till I exit this browser which is about now.

Guest's picture
David Bustard

So, I once saw a pirate standing outside my houde he was having a sword fight with a fire hydrent. He lost because he knocked that bolt off and got soaked with water. I invited him into my home. He felt threatened and drew his sord but i coforted him and gave him some sand to play with, of course he was delited with his home land and he thanked me with some of his booty (treasure). I have since cashed in the gold and bought the first pirates but yet to get the second.

Paul Michael's picture

That's the kind of thing I want. Right now, you're the front-runner David. You're also the only runner, but hey, you never know.

Guest's picture

So i went to see the Pirates of the Carribean: The Dead Man's chest with a couple of my friends because of our love for pirates. As we were entering into the theater, the lights dimmed and all of a sudden a shadow engulfed the screen, blocking any light. We heard a loud "ARRGH," followed by a "SURRENDER YE BOOTY" as ten pirates swung from the ceiling in front of us. Now as a charter member of the Pirate Protection Agency (PPA), I had to do something about this. Though i love pirates, i know i needed to protect my friends from harm. With my pirate defense training, i started fighting the pirates. Luckily, i carried my sword with me. I battled for half an hour, swords clinging left and right, until the pirates realized they were not strong enough to defeat me. So in a last ditch attempt, they cut the screen down the middle, ruining it. I was angered by this, so I chased after the pirates, but unfortunately these pirates drove expensive sports cars they bought with their stolen booty. My Camry was no match for them. As we returned to the theater, the attendant told us they were not going to show the movie anymore because it posed a great risk for another pirate attack. So i would like the DVD so i can watch the movie in the safety of my home, free from any pirate raids.

Guest's picture
Pirate Wild Bill

I once loved a pirate wench. She was a beauty. But our parents came between us. They both wanted us t' tie t' knot, or splice t' mainbrace or somethin' like that, and o' course that meant we never wanted t' see each other again. She sailed on, and be now probably a beautiful and happy wench while I be stuck in dry dock wonderin' and gatherin' barnacles. A movie like t' Pirates o' t' Caribbean would certainly jump start t' datin' life again and aye get t' old mast rubbed by an old wench again. Please send the movie quickly you scurvy dogs!

Guest's picture

I am in need of a good coaster and the Cars DVD would suffice.

(actually i like the movie and am too cheap to buy a kid's movie and admit that i am immature)

Paul Michael's picture

one of my fav all time TV shows (hey, I'm English, I grew up with him) is a possible way to get a freebie. But I'm not falling for it.

Guest's picture
jenny s.

When I was a child, our family car was named Puff the Tragic Wagon.

It was a school-bus yellow 1974 toyota pickup with a muffler that was held on with coat hangers and wire. You had to drive with all the windows down in the dead of winter because the whole thing stank like gas. You could hear it coming a mile away. When my mom would pick me up from school, all the children would point and laugh at me before it even rounded the corner, because they could hear it coming, ka-THANG ka-THANG ka-thuck thuck thuck.

If I get a free DVD out of this story, it will make all my childhood humiliation amount to something.

Can I have Cars please?

Paul Michael's picture

A tragic story. I will certainly think about it, although I can make no promises until the deadline is here.

Guest's picture

When I was three and riding with my dad in his VW, he had to come to a sudden stop. I'm not sure how it happened because, like, I was only three, but I have an inch-long scar on my nose. My parents told me that my nose was nearly ripped off, and that the small scar on the side of my nose once went almost all of the way around. The doctor who stitched me up did a terrific job and, until I tell you that it's there, you probably won't notice it. I'm not making this up... It really happened and I have the scar to prove it.

When I was about 5, I jumped over the rim in the above-ground 30" deep pool my parents had bought us, and I kept my face from hitting the bottom by jamming my hand on a wind-up metal sea-plane. I came up and watched as my hand turned from wet with a red streak into nearly solid red from hand to elbow. Mother went a bit hysterical, then pulled herself together and took me to the hospital. Seven stitches on that one.

When I was 7 and riding my bike on the sidewalk, a neighbor came zooming out of his garage and down his steeply inclined driveway, knocking me over and cutting a deep gash in the top part of my foot. I walked home leaving a trail of bloody prints of my right foot. I was pretty calm about it and asked my dad to get me something to stop my foot from bleeding. He asked me, "Do want a band-aid?" I said, "No... I don't think we have any band-aids big enough." My grandparents were there at the time and I never saw such confusion as everybody tried to do everything at once. Fourteen stitches.

When I was 11, I went through a glass shower door, getting slashed both going in and pulling myself out. I even got another one when I sat down to recover from having been sliced and diced. I screamed bloody murder. Mother, cooking in the kitchen, sent my youngest sister to see what was wrong. I was naked and I did not want my sister to see me naked, so I stuck my arm out the door. It was sopping wet with blood and there was a large shard of glass protruding from it. My little sister went ape-**** and ran through the house, shrieking like she'd just been branded. My mother decided that she had best investigate in person. When she got there, she went white as a klansman's hood and looked like she was going to lose it. She didn't, though, and started wrapping towels around the wounds that did not have obvious pieces of glass sticking out of them. She sent the middle sister across the street to get the help of the retired Marine Colonel. He came at once--I had somehow splattered blood on her leg, so he caught the sense of urgency despite my sister's self-reported incoherence. They carried me out to the street naked. I was less mortified by the blood streaming from seven large wounds on my body than by having my nakedness paraded before the entire neighborhood and my naked butt put on the grass. He ran across the street to get his Lincoln with white leather seats. He put me in the back seat and told my mother to sit with me while he drove to the hospital. I tried to make light of the situation, saying, "I guess I'm gonna miss football practice tomorrow." My mother did not understand and asked me to repeat it. When I did, she stuck her head out the window and barfed. Some people have no sense of humor. That was 117 stitches on the outside with a large number of things stitched up on the inside. In removing the stitches on my back, the doctor (who had not done the neat, careful stitching of the others) left part of one stitch in my back. I kept complaining about the itch until my mother took me back to see a doctor at the hospital. He probed around a little, finally found the small bit of stitching and pulled it free, coated with a yucky yellow-brown layer of necrotic tissue. For some reason, I still frequently have an itch there 38 years later.

By the way, the Marine would not even let my parents pay to have his car cleaned. A real class act, he was. Pretty much every Marine I have met has been that way.

Since then, I fell down a trail at Scout camp (7 stitches), caught one of those old metal fans as it toppled (5 stitches), and blew off getting stitches in a cut on my face, leaving me with a mildly roguish scar near my eyebrow. I also have burn scars on my legs and a large, deep-puckered scar from back surgery. The scars from my vasectomy are too small to worry about, and most people don't even notice them at all. The same for the scars from having my wisdom teeth removed, although I have never had anyone ask to see those, whereas some women do want to see the vasectomy scars. Given that some women are fascinated by my vasectomy scars, I have tried the pick-up line of, "Hey... Wanna see my vasectomy scars?" It worked once, even though she'd already seen them. Some women are just fixated on testicle surgery, I guess.

So. That's why I think you should give me the Scars movie. Hopefully, when I think of the klutzy things I have done and all of the little reminders that life has written on my flesh, it will help to give me a sense of humor about it all, and not blow it out of proportion.

Guest's picture

I'll take cars off your hands, no one wants to see it but I'll destroy it for you.

Plus it's also taking up precious space in your house.

The plastic wrapper is also dangerous to small children.

No one else can possibly enjoy a movie about a car.

You don't want to get associated with rednecks by watching that has car racing aka associated with NASCAR aka associated with rednecks. /some of my best friends are rednecks so don't be offended you rednecks.

The animation is way overrated!

By watching Cars I'll improve my writing and I'll quit posting here hence you won't have to read another huge list by me.

Puff doesn't really want it since he couldn't think of a long list of crappy reasons for wanting it like I did, plus everyone loves lists like they love lines.

Guest's picture

I would very much like Pirates 2 because I never got to see all of it at the theater. My boyfriend and I went to see it at a theater we had never been to before. The nice thing about this theater was that it had a bar. We spent some time at the bar before going in to see the movie. We must have been drinking too much because we walked into the wrong movie and never realized it. We accidentally walked into an earlier showing of Pirates which had already been playing for an hour. Seeing that the movie had started we figured we had only missed the first few minutes or so. Throughout the movie we were very confused since we had missed the events of the first hour. I kept wondering why Keira Knightley was dressed up like a boy (???). It was still great though! We left the theater happy and didn’t realize anything was wrong until the next day when we were talking about how “short” it had been. Not a very crazy story but it made us laugh our butts off afterwards. We don’t get out much really.

Guest's picture

I'm simply fascinated by the melodious squeaks that are produced by rubbing your finger over the labeled side of a DVD. It warms my heart so...

By giving me the movies, you are contributing to the world as a whole. My happiness from the squeaky fun shall pass on to others, and from there, it shall continue further and further until we achieve world peace!

Please, let us heal the world. Give me them squeaky disks.

Guest's picture

Keira Knightley, nuff said.

Guest's picture

I need you to give me Dead Man's Chest immediately. Do it. NOW. I have such a case of the hots for Captain Jack Sparrow, and have worn out my copy of Curse of The Black Pearl, by watching it and creating various fantasies in my mind's eye (Aye!) about the two of us in various states of pillaging and plundering our booty (booties!) together! I have worn out my fantasies with this version of the movie, and to not give me Dead Mans Chest would be depriving a 40-ish single woman, in her sexual prime, of new material and future orgasms! Perish the thought!

Guest's picture
Dean in Des Moines

Why would someone enter such a drawing? Because, for the first time, I'd be happier with the runner's up prize. Heh.

Guest's picture

I just got 'terminated' from my government job of 2.5 years without explanation by a letter. Yes, that's right, they sent me a letter. I did not get asked in for a meeting, nor did I get a phone call -- all I got was a lousy, certified letter.

It's a sad story. I mean, c'mon, I'm a poor, underpaid, yet over-worked college student and I just got terminated. A free movie would definitely right all those wrongs, don'tcha think?

Paul Michael's picture

THat one may be honest enough to be a winner. Caro, I'm really sorry. I got laid off when I first came to the US, on my birthday. It sucks.

Guest's picture

Although my member is already enormous, I'd sure like to have the video Cars. I'm sure it includes 'Vettes, Lambo's, Maybach's and probably a Rolls Drophead Coupe ot two, just to give the old boy some aspirations.

Guest's picture

They're both good DVDs and I might watch it once or twice, but I would pretty much sell it and make a few dollars. That's not as noble as donating it to my alma mater's video collection, but on the other hand the sooner I get out of debt the sooner I can donate to my alma mater's capital campaigns!

Guest's picture

I tried to burn a copy of my friends "Cars" DVD but there was some sort of program that prevents people from burning Disney/Pixar DVD's. Keep it frugal... Thanx

Guest's picture
Melissa Z

I actually don't own many DVDs, just because I could never part with the money for them. I usually used said money on useless things like food. : (

I've been ridiculed for too long for not having Pirates of the Caribbean in my [already pitiful] inventory of DVDs, and I'd love to rub peoples' faces in a brand-new, glorious Pirates DVD.

Also, the Pirates sequel had just come out when I was visiting California during the summer. I remember going to a beach there, and we chose a fire pit next to a bunch of pirates. Because of that, every time I see PoTC, I think of those pirates on the beach, roasting sausages on a stick or playing volleyball. It's a pretty great mental image of Jack Sparrow.

Guest's picture
That Guy

The irony of your decision to award me the Pirates DVD is that I don't resort to piracy to download it illegally.

Paul Michael's picture

Keep 'em coming folks. I enjoy reading every entry. So far, Cars seems to be the unpopular DVD, so think of the children...please, think of the children!

Guest's picture

I have this friend that hates, hates, hates the movie Cars. He's a pretentious filmmaker, so he can go on for hours about everything he thinks is wrong with that movie. And one night he did.

With a few drinks in him, and a Cars poster on the wall, he just went off. Every time he looked at the poster, he'd start in on another rant about how much he hated the movie. Having never seen it, I just nodded and laughed at his ridiculousness. Eventually, he'd stop. For about two seconds. Then he'd look up at the poster and start all over again...

And that why I want the Pirates DVD!

Guest's picture
Natasha Martin

I do not deserve Any of these dvds as i am a horrible annoying person. but hey. you have to be in it to win it. But on the offchance, in case i am lucky to win one then it would have to be CARS as we already have pirates2 and my kids would LOVE cars. Especially my little boy.

Guest's picture

Most people have DVD collections that seem to reproduce and multiply bt themselves. However, I am a 'late-bloomer'. A few years ago I found my collection of old 8-track tapes, mostly from a Columbia House collection if you readers remember when. (The player long since died.) Now after collecting a bunch of Video Cassette tapes, I've finally gotten a DVD player and I have only 2 DVDs. So the addition of just one DVD will increase the families' enjoyment some 50 percent! Call us frugal, or call us stupid, but the old Zenith console TV finally gave out after 32 years wonderful use. It still works but the internal fine tuning knob broke off inside and I cannot fine tune it to channel 3 for Video Cassette playing. Nust when I had in mind to drill through the front tuner mechanism to get to it, we saw a great Walmart sale on a 27" LCD High definition TV set. Damn, what a beautiful picture!

Guest's picture

i want cars because i want to be a drivers ed teacher and cars would be fun to teach with. those cars are fast, and so do i. yay!

Guest's picture

My request is for "Cars" DVD and it isn't entirely for the children I'm sorry to say. First, I'm a mother to four children and life gets busy, sometimes too busy, sometimes it becomes extremely messy. In fact, I might as well make a confession.

Ready for the confession? I'm in love with Mater, yep I love that little truck. I watched the movie twice before it disappeared from my sight, it quickly ran ... yes I do mean the video, up those stairs and from my understanding he's been playing with the kids. The kids mind you like to play frisbee and hide-n-seek so it shouldn't be such as surprise when I tell you, he's missing.

So, now I went out and bought myself that little stuffed car, just to hear his little voice and funny things he says and does. I can barely remember the movie now, so instead I push his buttons. But sadly I think I'm wearing him down as he only likes to grumble and moan.

So, I'm coming to you and begging you please, please, please send me, that little truck back my way. My thumbs is out and all.

Guest's picture

I desperately need a birthday gift for my 3 year old nephew. "Cars is his absoleute favorite! Thanks!
Fallen on hard times in Illinois