cheap weddings

How to Attend a Wedding for Cheap (Without Actually Looking Cheap)

Beth Buczynski — Mon, 14 Jul 2014 15:00:05 +0000

Summer is wedding season, and if, like me, you're at that age when all your friends are tying the knot, it can be a nightmare for your pocketbook. Modern weddings seem to be more elaborate than ever, piling on the costly obligations for guests who just want to show the happy couple some love. (See also: How to Shave $5,000 Off Your Wedding Expenses)

If you're tired of whipping out the credit card every time an invitation lands in your mailbox, this list of money-saving tips is for you.

Far Away? Send a Gift Instead of Attending

If you're hundreds (or even thousands) of miles away from the wedding location, realize that it's okay to decline attendance. No invited guest is expected to attend, even if that's not explicitly stated by the couple. Especially if it's a last-minute wedding. Instead, splurge on the gift and send it with a nice handwritten note of congratulations.

Find Your Own Lodging

When a couple knows people will be traveling to attend their nuptials, they often try to help by blocking off rooms at a local hotel. While convenient, never assume that this is the most cost effective option. Explore local hotel rates for yourself as well as options on Airbnb. If you know others who will be attending, think about getting an entire house or apartment, and splitting the bill.

Look for a Gift That's Thoughtful Rather Than Expensive

This is true 100% of the time, but especially if you're an out of town guest. Contrary to popular belief, there is no "minimum price" for a wedding present. Give from the heart. It could be something that's funny, practical, or homemade. (See also: 25 Gifts You Can Make Today)

Use the Registry to Your Advantage

If the couple announces that they've registered at one or more stores, it behooves you to investigate their requests as early as possible. Sign up for sale alerts and customer loyalty programs at those stores if they exist, then be ready to snag a wanted item when the cost is low or you've got a coupon.

Don't Take Gifts on the Plane

Once you've chosen your gift, ship it directly to the recipients rather than taking it on the plane (if traveling long distance). You'll save yourself the extra baggage fee and a huge logistical hassle. If you're traveling by car, obviously the converse is true. Save on shipping fees by bringing it yourself.

Extend Your Stay and Make it a Vacay

If you're going to three or more weddings in a year, there's a good chance your vacation time will go the way of the dodo. When a friend of ours recently got married at the beach over a long holiday weekend, we used the coincidence to our advantage: We arrived a day early and stayed a day late, turning it into a mini vacation.

Skip Pre-Wedding Events

It must be all the wedding shows on TV, but modern weddings have gone from "a ceremony and a reception" to three day long mini festivals. There are bachelor and bachelorette parties, bridal showers, pre-wedding brunches and dinners, and spa dates — and that doesn't even include the main event! Unless you're immediate family or in the wedding, all of these are optional. Save big by skipping pre-wedding money pits.

Don't Be in the Wedding Party

If the bride or groom asks you to be in the wedding, it's a great honor, but not an obligation. Wedding party duties involve throwing showers, planning pre-wedding events, and buying expensive outfits that you'll probably never wear again. Be honest: Tell the couple that your budget doesn't allow you to participate in the wedding party, but you can't wait to attend the ceremony.

Be a Slow Gift Giver

Did you know that you're not required to bring the gift to the actual wedding? According to the Emily Post Institute, you have up to three months from the date of the wedding to give a gift without violating any etiquette rules. So if money will be less tight in a few weeks, just wait.

Recycle Outfits

You don't have to wear something different to every wedding you attend. If some of the same people will be at more than one upcoming ceremony, invest in a classic outfit that can be made to look different by swapping accessories. You can also borrow something from a friend, or rent an expensive dress and return it when done.

How do you trim the cost of attending weddings? Please share in comments!

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This article is from Beth Buczynski of Wise Bread, an award-winning personal finance and credit card comparison website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:

Great Sites for Online Wedding Shopping

Margie Fishman — Thu, 26 May 2011 10:24:20 +0000

Getting married today does not require buying into the wedding industry’s “your special day is priceless” sales pitch.

When my husband and I got hitched last October, we skipped the sterile hotel banquet hall for a rickety gazebo and beach house overlooking our neighborhood lake. The venue oozed sentimentality in a charming 1960s Catskills sort of way, but to say it was "raw" was an understatement.

The space demanded tons of decor to camouflage the chipping paint, concrete bathrooms, and cork announcements board. I also needed wedding basics to get me through the day, so I turned to my favorite lazy girl’s shopping resource — the Internet — to purchase rattan fans from China, lingerie from Illinois, and seven-foot bamboo poles from California.

Don’t get me wrong, the brick-and-mortar route makes sense for certain items, such as fragile pieces, perishables, and that wedding dress you drooled over in a magazine but never bothered to try on. (I found mine at a local consignment shop for $50).

But most everything else can be had with the click of the mouse. (See also: Alternative Wedding Ideas for Big Savings)

No-Brainer Wedding Website Creation: MyWedding

Personally, I think creating a wedding website for the couple is a bit hokey, but it is also a convenient way to communicate a ton of information, including directions to the event, wedding registry, photos, hotel information, and a list of area attractions. The clincher for me? I’m too environmentally-friendly (and cheap) to spring for separate RSVP cards, so I had guests respond directly to the site. There are many options for free wedding websites, but I found mywedding.com had the most straightforward setup and classiest templates.

Restaurant Supply Mecca: Instawares and LinenTablecloth

It’s no big secret that it’s less expensive to buy your own tablecloths, silverware, dishes, and glassware than to rent. My stainless steel salad forks cost eight cents each at Instawares.com. My 120-inch round tablecloths were $12 each at Linentablecloth.com (they also sell on eBay, so cross-check for deals before purchasing). An added bonus is that both these sites regularly run deals for free shipping with minimum spending limits. Granted, I went the no-frills route, preferring to spend more on flowers than on gold-encrusted place settings and silk linens. But I was able to make my money back on most items after the wedding.

Everything Else: eBay and Etsy

Sadly, with the influx of “buy it now” vendors on eBay, the auction site has lost some of its “thrill of the chase” attitude. But it’s still a valuable resource, especially if you know exactly what you want. Here’s a sample of my wedding fare purchased from eBay: personalized favor tags, hair clips, silk flower petals, rehearsal dinner dress, wedding heels, my hound dog’s bowtie, plastic wine glasses, Spanx pantyhose, and a ring pillow.

For vintage and handmade items, the pricier Etsy furnished my birdcage veil, “Save the Date” e-invites, bridal bouquet holder, and groom’s card.

As with any other online shopping experience, there are risks of misrepresentations and shipping snafus. My vintage-inspired library drawer (which doubled as our guest book) arrived with the handle broken off. My veil, which looked so elegant in the photo, appeared frumpy in person. Fortunately, I’ve found most eBay and Etsy vendors are receptive to resolving customer concerns.

Regrets? I Have a Few.

The best advice I have to offer? Know when to pay. Research, organizational skills, a low-maintenance attitude, and a flexible job also come in handy when shopping online for a wedding.

Going against my better judgment (and to my mother’s horror), I purchased simple, inexpensive his-and-hers wedding bands on Etsy and eBay, respectively. Mine turned out fine (though I never bothered to get it formally appraised). My husband’s “titanium” ring arrived too big and got banged up within a few weeks. That frilly script that looked so regal on the proof for my wedding invitations, ordered from TheAmericanWedding, was barely legible out of the box.

Finally, I know the all-encompassing wedding planner tool at Google (including budgets, seating charts, address books, and playlists for the deejay) puts Excel to shame. Just remember you still need a real live person — be it a day-of coordinator or a family friend — to execute your vision on the actual wedding day.

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This article is from Margie Fishman of Wise Bread, an award-winning personal finance and credit card comparison website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread: