trying new things

How to Step Out of Your Comfort Zone and Try Something New

Julie Rains — Mon, 18 Mar 2013 11:24:37 +0000

Do you want to try new things?

Maybe you do, maybe you don't.

New adventures involve risk and uncertainty. And you may be at a phase in your life where you are seeking stability. For example, when my children were young, my time, thoughts, and energy were devoted to maintaining safety and the status quo.

At some point, though, you may feel you are spending too much effort on keeping things "as is" and not enough on striving for what could be. For me, this realization came when I noticed that the most perilous thing I attempted on a regular basis was running the dishwasher at the same time as the microwave (unless impeccably timed, this set-up would cause a breaker to switch off).

Since then, I have tried many new things. My list includes running a 5K and half-marathon, taking graduate-level courses online, doing indoor cycle (spin) classes, growing lettuce in a garden, organizing a group to provide meals for an inner-city outreach program, and participating in the local MS Bike Ride (which involved more new things like riding with a group and showing new cyclists how to use cue sheets).

Your list may be different than mine. But the hows of trying new things are often the same, whether an excursion to a new consignment store, a hike on a new trail, cooking with a new recipe, or the launch of a new career. (See also: How to Do Things That Scare You)

Choose What Inspires You

Intrinsic motivation will get you started and help overcome challenges.

You probably have a bucket list or wanna-try inventory of items awaiting your attention. If not, get a pen and paper, record your dreams, and narrow down to one or two new things you'd like to do soon.

Remember That It's Okay To Be Scared

Trying new things is exhilarating for some, scary for others. Whether you are truly thrilled or massively intimidated, don't let (irrational) fear stop you.

And don't think that you are alone in your dread. Here are a few of the things that I have worried about:

Seeming incompetent to others in all areas, not just the new realm that I am exploring
Wasting my time and being disappointed
Coming in last place
Paying too much for stuff (expert advice, gear, etc.) because of inexperience
Getting hurt
Embarrassing myself in front of other people
Getting in trouble because I didn't understand and follow some rules
Ruining an experience for companions because of my lack of expertise

You'll likely find that others, who now appear to be comfortable or masterful at whatever you are now attempting, were once uneasy, too. But they found a way to ignore demons and confront their fears; you'll do the same.

Do Your Research

You'll naturally want to do research online. And you should.

Sure, reading how to do X is not the same as doing X. And, no matter how many articles you read or forums you visit, you can't fully grasp the nuances of the new experience.

But you can often get enough information to try something new on your own. Or, if you're still unsure, you can familiarize yourself with the topic, learn the main issues to consider, and form the questions you'll need answered to get started.

Talk to a Friend Who Has Done What You Want To Do

A trusted friend can guide you through the process of learning something new. The right person will explain what's standard practice and what's unproven. She will share tips about what has worked for her and what she has noticed has helped other people.

The best way to tap a friend's expertise is to get general advice when you are getting started. Then, as you take steps to become more proficient, get her insights on specific concerns. This way, your buddy serves as an occasional resource rather than full-time mentor.

Make New Friends Who Can Advise You

If you don't have someone in your life who can help you, make new friends.

Last year, while training for a half-marathon, I realized I needed help. Although I had researched how to handle race-day scenarios, I wasn't really sure how suitable this advice was for me.

So, I struck up a conversation with a woman on a trail where I often ran. Like me, she was a mom who had just a few hours each week to dedicate to training. I approached her as she was stretching, asked her what she was training for (always a great way to get an athlete to start talking; her response was that she was getting ready for a season of half-marathons), and then posed my questions about fueling and hydration during the race.

Not only did she kindly answer my questions, she also offered encouragement. She recalled her first race and told me about the sense of accomplishment that crossing the finish line had given her, and how she has continued to set more aggressive goals.

Talk to an Expert

An expert can be a great resource. Look for those who relate well to beginners, are willing to help you take the next step no matter where you are starting, and enjoy helping those eager to try something new. For me, those have been local merchants and service providers plus friends who happen to have expertise in a certain field.

Just as you might approach a friend, try to learn the basics on your own and then ask for insights on specific concerns.

Take a Class

Outside instruction can help you get the skills needed to try something new and provide a great foundation for further learning.

Look in these places to find classes:

Community college
Local merchants or service providers
Non-profit organizations
Online sources

Classes may be offered over several weeks or presented in shorter time frames. I have taken quarter-long classes in bread baking, CPR, personal taxation, and more at the community college. Plus I have participated in half-day sessions to quickly get the basics on things like how to start a garden or the finer points of riding in a double paceline. So, even if you don't have much time, you may still be able to squeeze in a short but valuable lesson.

Learn the Big Mistakes

Get the lowdown on big mistakes to avoid when planning a new adventure.

This insight comes from my brother-in-law based on a conversation he had soon after becoming a program manager for a North Carolina television station. New people are hired largely to bring fresh approaches to programming. A wisened manager there gave him just one tip in the "whatever you do, don't do 'X'" format. At the time, "The Andy Griffith Show" was a mainstay. The advice was (and here, I will keep this advice family friendly): "Whatever you do, don't mess with Andy."

In many new experiences, whether it's going to a new restaurant (don't order the "Y") or taking a backpacking trip to a new area (remember to bring "ABC") there's a never-do-this-one-thing or be-sure-to-do-this-other-thing caveat. Pay attention, and don't think you'll be the exception on your first try.

Start Early

If you are attempting something new, it's likely that one element will not go as anticipated or planned.

There might be instructions you misunderstood or a map that you misread or a piece of equipment that needs repair. An early start means you have time to fix problems without compromising your success.

Take Small Steps

Taking small steps works for many new things with exceptions such as skydiving or rappelling.

Be patient with yourself. Just keep moving forward. Eventually, you'll notice that small movements have pushed you to the point that a big leap would have taken you.

Trying new things is its own reward, freeing you to have the experiences that you long to enjoy. But, along the way, you may learn to navigate new situations, overcome fears, cultivate patience, show humility, become more interesting, and deepen friendships.

What new things have you tried recently? What helped you have a great new experience?

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This article is from Julie Rains of Wise Bread, an award-winning personal finance and credit card comparison website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread:

25 New Things to Do Today

Anna Newell Jones — Tue, 26 Jun 2012 09:48:17 +0000

It's easy to get into the habit of doing the same things day-in and day-out. Here are 25 new things to try today to give your life a little bit of a shake-up! (See also: Feeling Stuck? 100 Ways to Change Your Life)

1. Make Sure Everyone You Love Knows It

Do the important people in your life know how much they mean to you? When was the last time you told them? Whenever I let this slide I try to remember the season five finale of "Grey's Anatomy" that I randomly watched one day. As weird as it may sound, that episode reminds me why it's so important that loved ones know they're loved.

2. Get Prints Made of Your Digital Images

It seems like we're all taking pictures all the time (especially with Instagram's huge fame), but will future generations get to see these shots? Make sure your life's images don't get lost and forgotten. Fill up shoe boxes with photos so that down the road, your kids can go through and wonder about your life.

3. Call Your Mom (More)

She loves you and probably wants you to call way more than you do.

4. Run Through a Sprinkler

Nothing screams summer quite like running through a sprinkler. When was the last time you did it? This is a cheap idea, and it's a great way to feel like a kid again while doing something responsible — watering your lawn.

5. Say "Yes" to Everything for One Full Day

Pull a Jim Carrey in the movie "Yes Man" — see what happens when you open yourself to everything that comes your way. Do you find that you automatically say "no" to things without even really considering them?

6. Conquer Your Public-Speaking Fear by Trying Out Toastmasters

Speaking in public can be completely dreadful. What if that fear was removed or if became manageable? Try out Toastmasters.

7. At a Restaurant, Let the Waiter Pick Your Entire Meal

I once ate dinner at a restaurant in Montreal called O.Noir. There was not a single light in the place, and we ate in pitch-black darkness. All of the waiters also happened to be blind. Needless to say, it was an unforgettable experience. Apart from the obvious, one of the things that stood out was that they had a "surprise meal" option. You could say if you were vegetarian or if you had other dietary concerns or restrictions, and they would accommodate that, but other than that, your meal was a complete surprise. Letting your waiter pick your meal is a way to get a little bit of the O.Noir experience no matter what city you live in.

8. Sleep in the Buff

If you've never done this before, it is completely liberating to try. Just be sure to keep a robe handy in case the fire alarm goes off.

9. Take a Bike Ride Through the City on a Summer Night

Here in Denver there is an event called the Moonlight Classic where some streets get shut down and bicyclists take to the road at midnight. The Denver Cruisers also hit the road every Wednesday night throughout the summer. Maybe your city offers something similar? Don't forget a bike light.

10. Write and Send a Hand-Written Letter

Everything is email, text, and IM these days. Break out a pen, and put it on paper.

11. Give a Sincere Compliment to at Least Three People

Who doesn't love a compliment? I love seeing people light-up and smile when they're complimented.

12. Try Cutting Your Own Hair

Cutting your own hair can feel very scary and intimidating the first time, but after you do it once, you'll wonder why you haven't been doing it all this time. (If you mess it up, then I'm sorry, and tell your hair-dresser I'm sorry too. Hey, it grows back, right?)

13. Tip Big

If you've ever worked in a restaurant, you know what hard work it is. You come home smelling like spoiled food, and it's a funk that's hard to wash out of your clothes. People can be rude, and the hours are sometimes brutal. Make someone's day by giving them a big tip. Trust me, they deserve it.

14. Shoot a Roll of 35mm Film

It can be exciting to not know exactly how a picture is going to turn out.

15. Decide What Your Three Wishes Would Be If a Genie Asked

Just have fun with it.

16. Do a "No Spend" Weekend

If you're not up for an entire year of no-spending, you can still positively impact your financial life by cutting back, even if it's for just a short amount of time.

17. Buy Bright Red Lipstick or Grow That Mustache

My husband hates the bright lipstick I wear. I like it, and I feel good wearing it. Even if no one is a fan of your choices but you, that's OK. Go forward with pride.

18. Take a Technology Break

Whenever I go on vacation, one of my favorite parts is that I get a break from technology. It's okay to cut yourself off for a day or two.

19. Wake Up an Hour Early

As hard as it is for me to wake-up early, I always feel better when I do. There a peacefulness in those early hours.

20. Throughout the Day, Keep a List of Things You Are Grateful For

It's easy to take things for granted. Keeping a list and reviewing it at the end of the day keeps things in perspective. If you can't get yourself to write things down throughout the day, even just thinking about what you're grateful for before you go to sleep is a good habit.

21. Make a Recipe You've Bookmarked on Pinterest

If you're anything like me, when you look at Pinterest, you get motivated to make and do lots of things but also discouraged that you're not making and doing lots of things. How many times do you make something you've pinned? Practically never? Today might be a good day to give one a go.

22. Get a Cardboard Box, Fill It Up With Clutter, and Donate It

Clearing out unwanted and useless junk feels good. Plain and simple.

23. Spend 20 Minutes Watching Funny or Die Videos

Laughing is good for you, and there is a lot of funniness happening on Funny or Die.

24. Create an Alter-Ego for Yourself

Do you wish your name was Natasha or Sven, you ran 20 miles a day, always stood up for the underdog, and had the most magnetic personality ever? Why not create that dimension of your personality in your mind and tap into it when you need extra strength?

25. Make a List of 33 Things to Do Before Your 33rd Birthday

It doesn't matter if you're turning 33 on your next birthday, or 20, or 63. Whatever stage you're at in life, create a list of things that you hope to accomplish before your next birthday.

What do you do when you need to get out of a rut? What one are you going to try from this list?

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This article is from Anna Newell Jones of Wise Bread, an award-winning personal finance and credit card comparison website. Read more great articles from Wise Bread: