If travel stirs your soul, get out there and do it!
An incredibly inspirational and entertaining read that you may find quite enlightening about the world of travel as a 50-something female is Tales of a Female Nomad: Living at Large in the World. The author is quite amazing, and she continues to live an inspirational nomadic life.
Although I didn't spell out solutions in a blatant step by step format, I thought I did cover what to do! For example, in the case of financial inequality, there are two things you can do:
1) Accept the fact that how much money each person brings to the table is irrelevant if the relationship is solid and you are in it for the long run.
2) Invoke a prenup if the concern is about protecting individual assets.
Sometimes, solutions don't come in the form of easy-to-apply quick fixes. Does that mean I shouldn't have written about it? Gosh, I hope not.
As illustrated with the tougher financial hurtles like Addiction, what you may need to get through the tough times is financial or couples' counseling. As a solution, counseling can apply to any of these financial challenges depending on the severity of the situation.
Good luck, and I hope this clears things up a bit.
Good for you, Andrea, for being comfortable enough to even go there. I can't say that I am brave enough to let go myself, but kudos to you and others who go for it.
This is a follow-up to #19, if you're still reading. On October 2nd, I was finally hired to the part-time position I talked about. I'm only working three days per week, but I'm making a fairly decent wage and I'm considering a second job two days per week.
This came as a blessing, but my confidence was almost nil and my depression was at an unbelievable high. Unemployment is something I've never wanted to deal with and would never wish on ANYONE.
All I can say is: even if you can barely stand up straight, keep applying to positions and keep pursuing employment. Don't ever stop, because it will only make things worse. An occasional interview will help boost your confidence, even if they decide not to hire you.
Also look at the big picture: what are my skills? What fields can I fit into? Is my resume up to date and in a proper format? The second point is a big one, IMO: I visited a staffing agency a couple of months ago and a director there was decent enough to tell me that my resume was in an outdated format and that recommendations shouldn't be included! They WERE included years ago, but I had been out of the job market since 2001!
BTW, I won't retract what I said about the economy, because in that regard I'm not optimistic. The people we have running the US are the politicians and businessmen who dragged us into this mess to begin with. Other than that, good luck with your job searches.
Here's an instance. Ron Rittenmeyer became CEO of eds. Making millions of course. He sold the company to hp for billions and gets a $66,000,000 'bonus'. Knowing full well that hp will lay off thousand of people. That figure is 25,000. Half in the US. To be replace with cheap shore workers. OH! Did I mention his son was hired into eds at a high level position. SCUM!!!!
hello. i'm an assistant manager for walgreens and i just wanted to clarify a couple of points.
-the register reward coupon are themselves manufacturer coupons (they are sponsored by the manufacturer). if you look at the top it will say "manufacturer coupon". so you cannot combine a register reward with another manufacturer coupon for a single item. but you can still combine it with coupons from the walgreens weekly sales ad.
-also there was a comment about using your rebate gift card to purchase gift cards to retailers. i may be mistaken, but i believe you cannot buy retailer gift cards with walgreens gift cards. retailer gift cards must be paid in cash, check, credit, or debit.
just thought i would give you all some insider info!
It might be useful to note that in most third world countries where there is corruption at the speeding ticket level, there is also rampant corruption at the highest governmental levels. And it's not a few agencies or politicians, it's almost every single one. It's impossible to even get elected without bribing the right people. There's plenty of nepotism and good-ole-boyism too. It's somewhat naive to think that it would happen at the lowest levels on an everyday basis and somehow not permeate the highest levels. This is not to say, of course, that it should not be pursued extensively and cleaned up at the highest levels in countries like the US but it's an exponentially larger problem in say, India or Mexico.
Helping someone take a class is a great idea for a gift. Learning something new is certainly a gift that keeps on giving long after the holidays have passed.
I'm well aware that there's plenty of corruption. (I live in Illinois, after all.) Especially between government officials and businesses that work for the government, there are all kinds of kickbacks, some more disguised than others. Another area that's rife with corruption is arrangements between government regulatory agencies and the businesses that they regulate, often in the form of high-paying industry jobs for former regulators.
Although I'd be very pleased to see all that cleaned up, it somehow seems less pernicious than having a government official come in and say, "Give me $100 or I'll shut your restaurant down because I've brought a dead rat with me and will claim that I found it here."
It also matters that the government does prosecute corruption charges when there's evidence of crimes being committed. (Some of the revolving door problems with regulators and the businesses they regulate stem from the fact that the behavior isn't illegal, even though it should be.)
I'd be very interested to hear of specific kinds of corruption that you can point to, though, since you seem to have a very different perception of the problem than I do.
I recently changed jobs. I felt a little bad about it. I didn't feel too badly towards my old company. I told them what I wanted, they said no, so I left. Nothing personal about it.
What I *do* have, is decent relationship with my new (old) boss. My new boss was an old boss, and I knew exactly what I was getting myself into. He's naturally going to try and get people for the least amount possible. I know this. He's also very *fair*, and rewards people proportional to the work they accomplish.
And he gave me a part time job, which is really what I wanted.
Even without any corruption--just with free markets--you can easily get the result of every outlet charging about the same price.
Putting aside things like different quality and better locations, for any product there's a single market-clearing price. If you charge more than that, your sales collapse, because everyone chooses to buy from a competitor. If you charge less than that, though, you're just cutting into your own profits for no particular gain. So, simple free markets can easily lead to the result you see--everyone charging the same price.
Of course, illegal price-fixing can produce the same result. There's really no well to tell the difference, except with something like undercover work--putting an investigator in the room to hear the parties colluding on prices.
On your other point, Is simple bias the same as corruption? After all, there's no way to know at the hiring stage who will be the most productive worker. In fact, it's often tough even after the fact to know which worker does more to add value to the enterprise--the one who gets more widgets made per hour, or the one who gets almost as many widgets made, but also raises the quality of all the workers around him by sharing ideas? Given that, it seems to me like it falls short of "corruption" to, for example, hire the children of my friends preferentially over strangers who seem like they might turn out to be about as productive.
As a follow-up, the local store has (eventually) made good, and appears to have a pretty straight-shooter as manager now. They gave me two free pies and a side, to boot, and the new manager was very professional and apologetic. Hope the good service continues!
i hear it so much from people when i cheekily tell them i don't believe in germs that i begin to doubt myself. but, i've traveled in third world countries, it's not as insanely sterile in those places, and people still manage to live long healthy lives.
i also feel like this obsession with packaging and disposable stuff for the sake of being 'clean' is so wasteful, so unnecessary, and a huge strain on our landfills.
I am an immigrant from India, currently living in the US for last 7 years. I am ashamed to say that India is very, very corrupt country.Please note, I love my country and plan to go back after couple of years. However in India, common man pays bribes for several things in the daily life. Some examples
1. To get out of a speeding ticket or a traffic violation
2. To get a government job or a contract
3. To get elected
4. To get out of a train / bus fare.
5. To get any work done in govt office
In last 7 years in the US, I have never paid or accepted bribe for anything. I can't imagine going back to India and living there being a part of the corrupt system!
This is a very interesting post, and the comments have been so helpful. Thank you to the professionals and customers who have added their comments. I've been trying to figure out how to get a second dental plan - our primary plan is okay, but with 6 mouths to care for, I'm looking for a way to insure all the stuff that our primary insurance doesn't cover. I would love to know if anyone has any experience with secondary dental coverage. My dentist's insurance person says that it isn't uncommon, but it usually comes from having two working parents with insurance.
Funnily enough, a cab driver in Shanghai talked to me about this, and in the end our conclusion was that money is equivalent to power everywhere. In America they don't call it bribes, instead, the politicians in congress have legal ways to accept money. In many instances millions of dollars from companies sure sound like bribes to create & vote on bills. It's also true that in America corruption is less obvious. You don't often see a politician get shot for embezzling in America, but it happens all the time in China.
EuroYank, instead of just saying we're naive, why don't you tell us why. Give us some supporting arguments. You'd further your case rather than just sounding condescending.
It would be nice to bribe one's way out of a speeding ticket rather than be penalized by the insurance industry's extortion. Of course it would be interesting to know if the Mexican police are honest about bribery, and only pull over people who are actually speeding.
I can not pay the garbage man a bribe uh, err tip. He can skip my pickup or trash my trash can too. Or, I can pay a "tip" and get my trash pickup a bit more frequently and the can is only ordinarily damaged. As long as the trash company gets its fee, the company doesn't care. At least in western Pennsylvania.
Soap (or non-soap based hand cleanser) and water for 30 seconds is the best way to get rid of germs for anyone who is well enough to be walking around in public. Antibacterials are really not necessary unless you're fighting sepsis. Furthermore, antibacterials do nothing for viruses.
You know all those people who die in the hospital from bacterial infections? Most of them are fighting off superbugs, or extremely resistant germs that cannot been killed off by garden-variety antibacterials.
Medical school ingrained in me that you shouldn't bring out the big guns unless you need them. Antibacterials for everyday use are overkill 99% of the time and actually may have detrimental effects. We use plain alcohol wipes for things like our stethoscopes and pens, but handwashing (and they have lotion next to every sink) is the biggest focus in limiting the spread of germs, both viral and bacterial.
I also consulted for a large metro public health department on pandemic influenza preparation-- you know what one of the biggest education efforts is? Teaching people simply to wash their hands with soap and water before eating, after using the bathroom, and after coughing/sneezing/blowing their nose. That's it. For all the fantastic medical technology we have today, sometimes the simplest solution is still the most effective.
You seem to focus on obvious corruption: slipping a benjamin to get out of a speeding ticket or paying Guido $500 a week to not get your legs broken. I tend to believe that corruption in the United States is less obvious. I see it taking the form of the good ole' boy system: hiring and/or promoting friends and relatives rather than the most qualified, giving the contract to a friend or relative rather than the best deal for the company or government. This also happens on a much larger scale: the tax breaks given to the large corporations over the last 8 years, the no bid contracts given to Haliburton, etc. I was unfortunate enough to experience corruption while going through a divorce: the two attorneys played a game designed to prolong the process, to file meaningless motion after meaningless motion by manipulating the hurt and anger felt myself and ex-wife. We see the corruption at the gas pump: How do all those gas stations set their prices within $0.02 of one another? This organized price setting is not questioned by anyone. If some less liked organizations did the same thing, it would be called organized crime. I believe that the United States has socially acceptable forms of corruption. Why do we turn a blind eye to this type of corruption but look down our noses at countries like Mexico where bribes are the only way to handle a speeding ticket?
What about the millions that lobbyists spend each year to "influence" politicians? I think that's where the corruption lies.
@Gitana,
If travel stirs your soul, get out there and do it!
An incredibly inspirational and entertaining read that you may find quite enlightening about the world of travel as a 50-something female is Tales of a Female Nomad: Living at Large in the World. The author is quite amazing, and she continues to live an inspirational nomadic life.
Good luck!
Although I didn't spell out solutions in a blatant step by step format, I thought I did cover what to do! For example, in the case of financial inequality, there are two things you can do:
1) Accept the fact that how much money each person brings to the table is irrelevant if the relationship is solid and you are in it for the long run.
2) Invoke a prenup if the concern is about protecting individual assets.
Sometimes, solutions don't come in the form of easy-to-apply quick fixes. Does that mean I shouldn't have written about it? Gosh, I hope not.
As illustrated with the tougher financial hurtles like Addiction, what you may need to get through the tough times is financial or couples' counseling. As a solution, counseling can apply to any of these financial challenges depending on the severity of the situation.
Good luck, and I hope this clears things up a bit.
Good for you, Andrea, for being comfortable enough to even go there. I can't say that I am brave enough to let go myself, but kudos to you and others who go for it.
This is a follow-up to #19, if you're still reading. On October 2nd, I was finally hired to the part-time position I talked about. I'm only working three days per week, but I'm making a fairly decent wage and I'm considering a second job two days per week.
This came as a blessing, but my confidence was almost nil and my depression was at an unbelievable high. Unemployment is something I've never wanted to deal with and would never wish on ANYONE.
All I can say is: even if you can barely stand up straight, keep applying to positions and keep pursuing employment. Don't ever stop, because it will only make things worse. An occasional interview will help boost your confidence, even if they decide not to hire you.
Also look at the big picture: what are my skills? What fields can I fit into? Is my resume up to date and in a proper format? The second point is a big one, IMO: I visited a staffing agency a couple of months ago and a director there was decent enough to tell me that my resume was in an outdated format and that recommendations shouldn't be included! They WERE included years ago, but I had been out of the job market since 2001!
BTW, I won't retract what I said about the economy, because in that regard I'm not optimistic. The people we have running the US are the politicians and businessmen who dragged us into this mess to begin with. Other than that, good luck with your job searches.
Here's an instance. Ron Rittenmeyer became CEO of eds. Making millions of course. He sold the company to hp for billions and gets a $66,000,000 'bonus'. Knowing full well that hp will lay off thousand of people. That figure is 25,000. Half in the US. To be replace with cheap shore workers. OH! Did I mention his son was hired into eds at a high level position. SCUM!!!!
hello. i'm an assistant manager for walgreens and i just wanted to clarify a couple of points.
-the register reward coupon are themselves manufacturer coupons (they are sponsored by the manufacturer). if you look at the top it will say "manufacturer coupon". so you cannot combine a register reward with another manufacturer coupon for a single item. but you can still combine it with coupons from the walgreens weekly sales ad.
-also there was a comment about using your rebate gift card to purchase gift cards to retailers. i may be mistaken, but i believe you cannot buy retailer gift cards with walgreens gift cards. retailer gift cards must be paid in cash, check, credit, or debit.
just thought i would give you all some insider info!
happy shopping!
It might be useful to note that in most third world countries where there is corruption at the speeding ticket level, there is also rampant corruption at the highest governmental levels. And it's not a few agencies or politicians, it's almost every single one. It's impossible to even get elected without bribing the right people. There's plenty of nepotism and good-ole-boyism too. It's somewhat naive to think that it would happen at the lowest levels on an everyday basis and somehow not permeate the highest levels. This is not to say, of course, that it should not be pursued extensively and cleaned up at the highest levels in countries like the US but it's an exponentially larger problem in say, India or Mexico.
My favorite book about frugality is Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry into Values.
Don't let the title fool you: it has nothing to do with Zen and everything to do with diy and being thrifty.
Helping someone take a class is a great idea for a gift. Learning something new is certainly a gift that keeps on giving long after the holidays have passed.
@EuroYank:
I'm well aware that there's plenty of corruption. (I live in Illinois, after all.) Especially between government officials and businesses that work for the government, there are all kinds of kickbacks, some more disguised than others. Another area that's rife with corruption is arrangements between government regulatory agencies and the businesses that they regulate, often in the form of high-paying industry jobs for former regulators.
Although I'd be very pleased to see all that cleaned up, it somehow seems less pernicious than having a government official come in and say, "Give me $100 or I'll shut your restaurant down because I've brought a dead rat with me and will claim that I found it here."
It also matters that the government does prosecute corruption charges when there's evidence of crimes being committed. (Some of the revolving door problems with regulators and the businesses they regulate stem from the fact that the behavior isn't illegal, even though it should be.)
I'd be very interested to hear of specific kinds of corruption that you can point to, though, since you seem to have a very different perception of the problem than I do.
Jenn, I totally did the same thing...put the teething ring in the bottle sterilizer. Glad I'm not the only one!
I recently changed jobs. I felt a little bad about it. I didn't feel too badly towards my old company. I told them what I wanted, they said no, so I left. Nothing personal about it.
What I *do* have, is decent relationship with my new (old) boss. My new boss was an old boss, and I knew exactly what I was getting myself into. He's naturally going to try and get people for the least amount possible. I know this. He's also very *fair*, and rewards people proportional to the work they accomplish.
And he gave me a part time job, which is really what I wanted.
@Wesley Simon:
Even without any corruption--just with free markets--you can easily get the result of every outlet charging about the same price.
Putting aside things like different quality and better locations, for any product there's a single market-clearing price. If you charge more than that, your sales collapse, because everyone chooses to buy from a competitor. If you charge less than that, though, you're just cutting into your own profits for no particular gain. So, simple free markets can easily lead to the result you see--everyone charging the same price.
Of course, illegal price-fixing can produce the same result. There's really no well to tell the difference, except with something like undercover work--putting an investigator in the room to hear the parties colluding on prices.
On your other point, Is simple bias the same as corruption? After all, there's no way to know at the hiring stage who will be the most productive worker. In fact, it's often tough even after the fact to know which worker does more to add value to the enterprise--the one who gets more widgets made per hour, or the one who gets almost as many widgets made, but also raises the quality of all the workers around him by sharing ideas? Given that, it seems to me like it falls short of "corruption" to, for example, hire the children of my friends preferentially over strangers who seem like they might turn out to be about as productive.
As a follow-up, the local store has (eventually) made good, and appears to have a pretty straight-shooter as manager now. They gave me two free pies and a side, to boot, and the new manager was very professional and apologetic. Hope the good service continues!
i hear it so much from people when i cheekily tell them i don't believe in germs that i begin to doubt myself. but, i've traveled in third world countries, it's not as insanely sterile in those places, and people still manage to live long healthy lives.
i also feel like this obsession with packaging and disposable stuff for the sake of being 'clean' is so wasteful, so unnecessary, and a huge strain on our landfills.
I am an immigrant from India, currently living in the US for last 7 years. I am ashamed to say that India is very, very corrupt country.Please note, I love my country and plan to go back after couple of years. However in India, common man pays bribes for several things in the daily life. Some examples
1. To get out of a speeding ticket or a traffic violation
2. To get a government job or a contract
3. To get elected
4. To get out of a train / bus fare.
5. To get any work done in govt office
In last 7 years in the US, I have never paid or accepted bribe for anything. I can't imagine going back to India and living there being a part of the corrupt system!
Thanks
This is a very interesting post, and the comments have been so helpful. Thank you to the professionals and customers who have added their comments. I've been trying to figure out how to get a second dental plan - our primary plan is okay, but with 6 mouths to care for, I'm looking for a way to insure all the stuff that our primary insurance doesn't cover. I would love to know if anyone has any experience with secondary dental coverage. My dentist's insurance person says that it isn't uncommon, but it usually comes from having two working parents with insurance.
Thanks for a great article!
Funnily enough, a cab driver in Shanghai talked to me about this, and in the end our conclusion was that money is equivalent to power everywhere. In America they don't call it bribes, instead, the politicians in congress have legal ways to accept money. In many instances millions of dollars from companies sure sound like bribes to create & vote on bills. It's also true that in America corruption is less obvious. You don't often see a politician get shot for embezzling in America, but it happens all the time in China.
EuroYank, instead of just saying we're naive, why don't you tell us why. Give us some supporting arguments. You'd further your case rather than just sounding condescending.
Its good you are naive, and really don't know how corrupt the USA is. Keep dreaming, because the truth would give you a heart attack!
It would be nice to bribe one's way out of a speeding ticket rather than be penalized by the insurance industry's extortion. Of course it would be interesting to know if the Mexican police are honest about bribery, and only pull over people who are actually speeding.
I can not pay the garbage man a bribe uh, err tip. He can skip my pickup or trash my trash can too. Or, I can pay a "tip" and get my trash pickup a bit more frequently and the can is only ordinarily damaged. As long as the trash company gets its fee, the company doesn't care. At least in western Pennsylvania.
Soap (or non-soap based hand cleanser) and water for 30 seconds is the best way to get rid of germs for anyone who is well enough to be walking around in public. Antibacterials are really not necessary unless you're fighting sepsis. Furthermore, antibacterials do nothing for viruses.
You know all those people who die in the hospital from bacterial infections? Most of them are fighting off superbugs, or extremely resistant germs that cannot been killed off by garden-variety antibacterials.
Medical school ingrained in me that you shouldn't bring out the big guns unless you need them. Antibacterials for everyday use are overkill 99% of the time and actually may have detrimental effects. We use plain alcohol wipes for things like our stethoscopes and pens, but handwashing (and they have lotion next to every sink) is the biggest focus in limiting the spread of germs, both viral and bacterial.
I also consulted for a large metro public health department on pandemic influenza preparation-- you know what one of the biggest education efforts is? Teaching people simply to wash their hands with soap and water before eating, after using the bathroom, and after coughing/sneezing/blowing their nose. That's it. For all the fantastic medical technology we have today, sometimes the simplest solution is still the most effective.
You seem to focus on obvious corruption: slipping a benjamin to get out of a speeding ticket or paying Guido $500 a week to not get your legs broken. I tend to believe that corruption in the United States is less obvious. I see it taking the form of the good ole' boy system: hiring and/or promoting friends and relatives rather than the most qualified, giving the contract to a friend or relative rather than the best deal for the company or government. This also happens on a much larger scale: the tax breaks given to the large corporations over the last 8 years, the no bid contracts given to Haliburton, etc. I was unfortunate enough to experience corruption while going through a divorce: the two attorneys played a game designed to prolong the process, to file meaningless motion after meaningless motion by manipulating the hurt and anger felt myself and ex-wife. We see the corruption at the gas pump: How do all those gas stations set their prices within $0.02 of one another? This organized price setting is not questioned by anyone. If some less liked organizations did the same thing, it would be called organized crime. I believe that the United States has socially acceptable forms of corruption. Why do we turn a blind eye to this type of corruption but look down our noses at countries like Mexico where bribes are the only way to handle a speeding ticket?