I'm actually surprised at the comments and this post. I'm a recent college grad and just started my first job ever. I'm not made of money. In fact I would like an I-Pod for myself but haven’t as its a bit pricy and I’m paying student loans off. But I know that I want an I-Pod and when I was younger I wanted a Nintendo and other expensive things. Sometimes I got them but more often than not I didn't. But what didn't change was that I still wanted those things. I still want them. So is a needy child not supposed to want things because he is needy? Is he or she not supposed to wish during the holidays or hope because their parents can't afford to fulfill them? I would rather they be honest about what they want whether it’s an Xbox or an IPod then lie and say they want socks just so someone in line at the bank can buy someone a pair of socks and feel good about themselves. Helping the needy shouldn't be about you but about the people you are helping. If you can't afford to then don't but don't get mad at someone less fortunate than you.
I'd agree with most of these, save for two. The dishwasher one (for the reason the first poster mentioned) and the "if it's yellow let it mellow" one. Leaving urine in your toilet can actually stain the bowl over time due to the uric acid in ones urine. Now if you don't mind the stains, by all means I guess.
...at work, and I picked out 2 toy gifts for a boy and a girl. I supplemented the requested, popularly branded, gifts with crayons and a couple of coloring books for the 4 yo girl, plus markers and a sketch pad for the 8 yo boy, plus an age-appropriate story book for each child.
My DH is a teacher, and has told me that kids come to pre-K without ever having seen a book, so I thought I'd spend a little extra money to help out these kids. Not reading to little kids, and not giving them access to books is just plain sad, and makes me want to cry.
Tonight I have to wrap the gifts and bring them in to put under the tree. It is a really nice tradition, as long as the kids want reasonable gifts. I hope the kids like what I got, and that the families aren't offended by the extras (and that they don't try to return them!).
However, another charity that my workplace helps with gives gifts to all family members, and the dad apparently asked for "snowmobile gear", so he'll be the last family member we spend money on. If you can are able to and can afford to ride a snowmobile, you can work to support your family. We may be switching charities for next year.
The one they put up at my husbands company breaks my heart every year. Kids ask for simple toys and warm clothes. The ones asking for a jacket or a pair of shoes just makes my heart hurt. Last year we bought a gift for a little girl (Dora the Explorer sleeping bag) and a Lego truck for a little boy. This year we're going to pick three kids and give the donations to them in the name of my husbands grand parents who don't need a physical gift.
But I agree that big ticket items are beyond ridiculous and I would protest as well.
my parents had the same fake tree for decades, i thought it was completely normal to first assemble one's tree before decorating it. i was quite an old kid before i realized that not everyone does that.
it's true that fake trees are made with plastic, etc, but the intention is that you buy one good tree and use it for 20 years. you don't buy a new fake tree every couple years and throw yours out. it's like anything else that's made with plastic -- lawn furniture, whatever. if we were in the mindset that you buy one and use it for ages, it wouldn't so much matter that things are made with plastic, the problem comes when we think of plastic things as disposable.
that said, i mainly go with fake because when i moved into this house, there was a fake christmas tree in the basement. free tree! how could i say no? :)
I grew up in Australia, so I know well the water saving tactics. After all, being the driest continent on earth, we are on constant water restrictions. When I moved to the USA a year ago, I was truly horrified at the amount of water wastage. To this day I cringe when I walk through my Californian neighbourhood and see the amount of sprinklers watering the sidewalk.
As for the water saving method of adding a bottle to your toilet cistern: In Australia every toilet is dual flush. Half flush for #1 and full flush for #2. I think this toilet should be implemented in every household.
I really think this varies by group. Our church has an angel tree every year to buy gifts for kids of prisoners. The parent is asked to give us the child's name, gender, age and then to make 2 requests - one for clothes (give us sizes) and one for a toy/fun gift. So there are 2 angels for each child on our tree (one for clothes, one for a toy.) The angel tag I chose this year was for a 3 year old boy, and it gave me his size (4T.) I was able to find him 2 pairs of pants, 2 long sleeved shirts, a package of underwear and a package of socks for just under $25, which I wrapped up in a big box. I know the clothes won't excite a 3 year old, but it will excite his caregiver, I'm sure, and I know someone else will buy him whatever toyw as on his toy angel. The coordinator for this program is clear in the guidelines to the parent filling out the info that they need to be reasonable and practical in their requests if they want it filled. The most extravagant thing I've seen given was a bicycle last year.
We recently acquired an energy star rated dishwasher. If you use the fast setting with the eco setting it supposedly uses a gallon and a half to run the cycle. Our sink holds more water than that. It has the two drawers so there is the benefit of being able to run a half load. We do try to make sure it is completely full before running. If we hand washed two drawers worth of dishes we would use far more between rinsing and having to refill the sink with clean water multiple times. As far as the old dishwasher, I don't even want to think how much water that thing was using.
I do try to put all of the silverware in a cup full of water beside the sink to cut down on rinsing. I also pulled out the spatula. That is what my mom used to get dishes ready to wash in the days before garbage disposals were the norm.
In the summer we use the dirty water out of the fish tank to water the veggie garden. We run a dehumidifier in the basement in the summer. Water from that goes to watering plants or garden beds.
I have to agree with Donna, Lindsey, Red Rebel and maybe a few others I missed up there. It can be really disheartening to see specific examples of greed and entitlement. But I feel that if you choose to give, you need to hold yourself above the fray a bit and keep your own judgment and cynicism in check as much as you can.
Use your own very best self to give generously to the very best selves of the people you are giving to. At some point, whether you are rich or poor, whether you know it or not, someone has been unselfishly, non-judgmentally generous to you. This is a wonderful force in the universe, and should be nurtured as much as possible.
It doesn't mean buying an ipod. But it means a little cock-eyed optimism and a lot of just letting it go.
This was the first year my husband and I participated in the Angel Tree program by Prison Fellowship (www.angeltree.org)- not to be confused with the program of a similar name run by the Salvation Army. These gifts go to kids who have a parent (or both) in prison. Each gift is limited to a value of $20, and the tag came with a gift suggestion from the incarcerated parent. The parent chooses out of an idea catalog. I really like this program because you can give on behalf of another person who can't be there to give a present to his/her child at Christmas.
I picked up two tags- one for an MP3 player and another for Tinkerbell pajamas. I ended up at Walmart because there weren't any Tink Pjs in the girl's size at the Disney store. I am happy to report that you CAN get an MP3 player (a basic one, no frills), and some great pjs (and a light up shirt) all within budget. If you shop the ads (especially for electronics)lots of good deals can be found...I agree- use those coupons and sales..especially online!
All this to say, I agree- if you want to give, then do so! Find an organization that matches with your values and beliefs about giving. We chose to give this way because we want those kids to know the gift of Jesus is why we celebrate Christmas, and that their parents, although not present in person, care for them too. Finally, I second the previous comment- don't just give at this time of year, give all year, so you can be familiar everything that organization does and understand if that's really where you want the money to go. The more you know, the more confident you can feel about giving through that organization.
I could not agree more with your posts and the commenters.
Esp the one that wrote about Commercials making children want things they cannot afford - we do not own or watch a TV any longer and I find that I want less things now. Now i just have to cut out the internet (as if I could!) and I could cut down on even more
I think much of the success of gathering wild foods is one's mindset and advanced preparation. Although I have a full-time job, I'm a scavenger by nature, and I take advantage of free edibles even though I could pay for them. Living in Oklahoma, I gather the following free and organic foods: pecans, acorns, persimmons, pears, apples, peaches, soy beans, tomatoes and sweet potatoes. I am a commuter biker, and when I ride about my small town, I take note of the trees that bear fruit and nuts. When their fruit is in season, it litters the ground and is so plentiful I have NEVER had anyone object to my stopping and picking some up. In fact, most people are grateful. Also, there are a number of community gardens here that I got permission to glean once the harvest was complete. It's amazing what you can find for free if you simply keep your mind open to the fact that free, organic food IS out there if you dust off and hone your natural gathering skills. It's December 9th, and I'm still eating fresh organic tomatoes that I gathered green when others didn't want to bother with them. Happy Gathering!
I have found out long a go that the stores that offer double coupons are only doing so because they have jacked up their prices higher in the first place. Competitively priced stores do not need to offer extra savings because they already are competitive.
But I have learned another thing about coupons as well. Most of the coupons ae for highly advertised name brand products. These products cost significantly more than a equivalent unadvertised brand does. Over the last few years we have tried out many of these secondary brands and found that they are often as good or better then the name brand products. These products are almost always cheaper then the name brand with a coupon.
The secret to really saving money when shopping is to educate yourself about the prices charged by various stores. Even most grocery chains operate at more then one price point. They will have a fancy store with higher prices on most items and a lower bare bones looking store selling the exact same stuff at lower prices. If you want to save money use those lower priced stores.
Additionally there are often small independent specialty retailers that are very price competitive. Successful small businesses can actually compete against big chains if they focus on selling large volumes of product. In our community I know of at least four small butcher shops that sell better meat at lower prices then any big chain store in town. And each of them treat you better while doing it.
If you want some good free advice on budgeting then check out my website.
Dont forget the classic: placing a 1 liter pop bottle full of water in the upper deck of your toliet so you use 1 liter less with every flush automatically!
The wish list on my building's Christmas Tree shows the same thing. I have participated the last 2 years, but sort through the cards requesting exorbitant gifts that I would consider too expensive for my dear loved ones, and find the child that is asking for small items, items that I can picture the child will cherish. Last year a 15 year old girl asked for a comforter set. This, of course, made me cry and I picked a beautiful set that I hoped she loved. This year, a 5 year old boy is receiving Hot Wheels, Spider Man toys and a ridiculous load of like-new secondhand books.
I guess the old adage that you won't receive what you don't ask for holds true, but I cannot give anyone an Ipod, a DVD player, etc.
I love giving, but I give just as modestly as I live.
I've seen several of these types of events recently, whether it's the names of needy folks on a tree or a community center sponsoring a potluck meal and gift exchange for the needy, where the guidelines say to bring a wrapped gift valued at $10.
Sometimes they specify whether you should bring a child's gift, an adult gift and whether it should be gender specific or unisex. Beyond that, there are no requirements or expections from either the givers or receivers.
I'm more likely to contribute to these events than ones with specific wish list items.
I also prefer to donate food or money to food banks. The idea of a family not having food at Christmas (or any time) is much more heartbreaking to me than them not having gifts.
A guy I work with, father used to char A piece of oak on the grill and then seal it up in A jar of moonshine. He said it smoothed out the flavor and gave it A carmel color like bourbon. Im sure you would want to age it as long as you could stand to.
I agree with Diane above about dishwashers being much more eco-friendly than they used to be.
I agree with you on everything else and do all of the things you mention at least part of the time. Other small helps include using the leftover water and melted ice from our glasses to water plants and saving water from boiling potatoes for bread recipes.
Hubby is less watchful of water usage, so I used to keep a plastic wash pan under the kitchen faucet to catch water that he would otherwise let go down the drain (overfilled ice trays, waiting for water to get cold enough, waiting for water to get hot enough, etc.) I used it to fill my washing machine. I can't do that anymore because I now have a front-loader. After much nagging on my part he's getting better about his water usage and waste.
I've read many of your posts on this subject and I can see both sides of the dime, but, bottom line, shouldn't all children, needy or not, be taught the real reason for the season? I'm not a religious fanatic, but I hate seeing children get so caught up in all the hype and commercialism so young in life. The writer makes valid observations regarding the "big wishing" being a huge turn-off, especially when you're actually having tough times in buying your own kids' gifts. I think it is a better life-lesson (at Christmas or anything throughout the year) to teach children to be grateful FOR WHATEVER THEY HAVE and to realize the season should not be about gifts, but about gratitude and love. So, I agree with the writer, I wouldn't buy a gift like these for these "needy" kids either.
Hi I live in Australia and am now in my 30's. I grew up in the republic of Ireland prior to the tech revolution of the 80's that turned the economy around. We knew a lot of people who got creative with what they had.
Certainly having a vegie garden and growing chicken and geese were among that list. But nothing was wasted, if a goose was butchered the feathers were used for pillows/quilts. A huge room was turned into a studio flat and rented out to a single elderly man. Many people rented out rooms and a sitting room or subdivided homes to rent etc.
Seasonal work was rotated, people joined Choirs and Traditional holidays played a great importance, for free time and family activities.
Even here in Oz, in the eastern states flea markets are very popular.
People holidayed locally.
Families only had one car. We learned to ride bikes, as children.
People had skills such as knitting and sewing. I was taught to knit and sew as part of the primary curriculum.
To summarize I think we are a lazy society but if people before us could do it and thrive so can we. Keep up the brain storming Philip it's a good thing. Michelle
It’s hard for me to see the spirit of the season (generosity) replaced by something else (cynicism?), especially since I’m feeling this way myself lately.
Part of being generous is to give without judgment. You are judging when you decide for someone else what is good for them (or not.)
If you’re giving, you might be giving to someone that hasn’t learned the same financial lessons that you have. They may not spend wisely, they may not save wisely. In fact, that might be part of the reason that they’re in the situation that they’re asking for help.
In other parts of your life, do you feel that it is OK to judge people based on what they’ve learned or not learned? Aren’t there some lessons in your life that took you longer to learn than it should have? Are there people who tried to help you learn those lessons, but you didn’t learn until you were ready to?
These are the things I try to remember when I’m giving. Not everyone has the same background and experiences as I have. Can I judge them for making different decisions than I do, because they’ve learned different lessons?
It doesn’t mean that I give to everyone who asks. I just try to be less judgmental, since I haven’t walked their path. It helps me see more of the generous spirit of the season.
The biggest difference I've personally noticed between other young family members and our own daughter is that our daughter doesn't see commercials. So while my nephew asked his single mother for the $400 (or more!) kiddie dinosaur and/or a PSP, and my husband's young cousin (she's 8) asked for a TV and some Bratz dolls, our daughter asked for a Nutcracker (on sale half off at Macy's!), some candy, and some books. The mall Santa seemed surprised at her requests, and by the fact that she was polite about it.
What I've also personally noticed in my own family is that those relatives of ours (my husband and I) that are not as well-off as we are (and we're really not!) have cable TV, TVs in every room, game systems, all of them smoke (a pricey habit!), and they all eat fast food all the time. When they see something on TV that they WANT, they find a way to pay for it...yet they've never got money for car fixes, or the rent, or the outrageous electric and gas bills. We have saved LOADS of money just by not having TV with commercials. Our daughter has characters that she likes because we'll buy movies or cartoon series' (like, the Smurfs, or Mickey and Pluto, Bugs Bunny, etc), but we mostly make her play with dress-up clothes and her kitchen (that my parents bought her), we read books to her, and we go "window shopping" (where we don't buy anything, but just look) a lot - that's where she got the Nutcracker idea, and a short visit to YouTube allowed her to view the Nutcracker ballet as well.
What I'm getting at with the long-winded post (sorry!) is that these kids are asking for things that they: 1. See on TV commercials, and 2. See other kids have. They probably know they're poor, so they use this opportunity to feel like they're not so bad off, or maybe so they won't be teased, or because they think that EVERY kid whose family has more money has one. But I'll lay most of the blame on the TV commercials from my personal experience.
It turns out that the question of which is more green, handwashing versus dishwashers is not exactly straightforward. Sure, if you have a 20 year old clunker, it's not exactly water or energy efficient. But if you have a newer EnergyStar model (post 2003), it is reasonably comparable to best handwashing practice, and beats "handily" sloppy handwashing practice which is more the norm (i.e., letting the water run at high pressure, rinsing instead of scraping food, not using a cold water rinse, etc.) See here for a comparison: http://www.slate.com/id/2189612/
I read somewhere else (EnergyStar's homepage, I think) that part of the secret is more efficient use of water in the newer machines, but also a turn towards heating at the machine, instead of relying on the house's central water heating to get the water temperature up high enough.
It all sure surprised me! I was poised to handwash forever, but I was persuaded that (given my husband's handwashing technique) that the dishwasher was the greener choice.
Yeah, daughter's allergic to pine. But hubby's got multiple chemical sensitivity, especially to petroleum products! One scratch on the arm of the artificial tree and he's on steroids until Valentine's day to combat the allergy! I love my ficus Christmas tree.
I'm actually surprised at the comments and this post. I'm a recent college grad and just started my first job ever. I'm not made of money. In fact I would like an I-Pod for myself but haven’t as its a bit pricy and I’m paying student loans off. But I know that I want an I-Pod and when I was younger I wanted a Nintendo and other expensive things. Sometimes I got them but more often than not I didn't. But what didn't change was that I still wanted those things. I still want them. So is a needy child not supposed to want things because he is needy? Is he or she not supposed to wish during the holidays or hope because their parents can't afford to fulfill them? I would rather they be honest about what they want whether it’s an Xbox or an IPod then lie and say they want socks just so someone in line at the bank can buy someone a pair of socks and feel good about themselves. Helping the needy shouldn't be about you but about the people you are helping. If you can't afford to then don't but don't get mad at someone less fortunate than you.
I'd agree with most of these, save for two. The dishwasher one (for the reason the first poster mentioned) and the "if it's yellow let it mellow" one. Leaving urine in your toilet can actually stain the bowl over time due to the uric acid in ones urine. Now if you don't mind the stains, by all means I guess.
...at work, and I picked out 2 toy gifts for a boy and a girl. I supplemented the requested, popularly branded, gifts with crayons and a couple of coloring books for the 4 yo girl, plus markers and a sketch pad for the 8 yo boy, plus an age-appropriate story book for each child.
My DH is a teacher, and has told me that kids come to pre-K without ever having seen a book, so I thought I'd spend a little extra money to help out these kids. Not reading to little kids, and not giving them access to books is just plain sad, and makes me want to cry.
Tonight I have to wrap the gifts and bring them in to put under the tree. It is a really nice tradition, as long as the kids want reasonable gifts. I hope the kids like what I got, and that the families aren't offended by the extras (and that they don't try to return them!).
However, another charity that my workplace helps with gives gifts to all family members, and the dad apparently asked for "snowmobile gear", so he'll be the last family member we spend money on. If you can are able to and can afford to ride a snowmobile, you can work to support your family. We may be switching charities for next year.
The one they put up at my husbands company breaks my heart every year. Kids ask for simple toys and warm clothes. The ones asking for a jacket or a pair of shoes just makes my heart hurt. Last year we bought a gift for a little girl (Dora the Explorer sleeping bag) and a Lego truck for a little boy. This year we're going to pick three kids and give the donations to them in the name of my husbands grand parents who don't need a physical gift.
But I agree that big ticket items are beyond ridiculous and I would protest as well.
my parents had the same fake tree for decades, i thought it was completely normal to first assemble one's tree before decorating it. i was quite an old kid before i realized that not everyone does that.
it's true that fake trees are made with plastic, etc, but the intention is that you buy one good tree and use it for 20 years. you don't buy a new fake tree every couple years and throw yours out. it's like anything else that's made with plastic -- lawn furniture, whatever. if we were in the mindset that you buy one and use it for ages, it wouldn't so much matter that things are made with plastic, the problem comes when we think of plastic things as disposable.
that said, i mainly go with fake because when i moved into this house, there was a fake christmas tree in the basement. free tree! how could i say no? :)
It's a wish list not a needs list.
Even if the parents are pushing for them to aim big- why shouldn't they?
I grew up in Australia, so I know well the water saving tactics. After all, being the driest continent on earth, we are on constant water restrictions. When I moved to the USA a year ago, I was truly horrified at the amount of water wastage. To this day I cringe when I walk through my Californian neighbourhood and see the amount of sprinklers watering the sidewalk.
As for the water saving method of adding a bottle to your toilet cistern: In Australia every toilet is dual flush. Half flush for #1 and full flush for #2. I think this toilet should be implemented in every household.
I really think this varies by group. Our church has an angel tree every year to buy gifts for kids of prisoners. The parent is asked to give us the child's name, gender, age and then to make 2 requests - one for clothes (give us sizes) and one for a toy/fun gift. So there are 2 angels for each child on our tree (one for clothes, one for a toy.) The angel tag I chose this year was for a 3 year old boy, and it gave me his size (4T.) I was able to find him 2 pairs of pants, 2 long sleeved shirts, a package of underwear and a package of socks for just under $25, which I wrapped up in a big box. I know the clothes won't excite a 3 year old, but it will excite his caregiver, I'm sure, and I know someone else will buy him whatever toyw as on his toy angel. The coordinator for this program is clear in the guidelines to the parent filling out the info that they need to be reasonable and practical in their requests if they want it filled. The most extravagant thing I've seen given was a bicycle last year.
We recently acquired an energy star rated dishwasher. If you use the fast setting with the eco setting it supposedly uses a gallon and a half to run the cycle. Our sink holds more water than that. It has the two drawers so there is the benefit of being able to run a half load. We do try to make sure it is completely full before running. If we hand washed two drawers worth of dishes we would use far more between rinsing and having to refill the sink with clean water multiple times. As far as the old dishwasher, I don't even want to think how much water that thing was using.
I do try to put all of the silverware in a cup full of water beside the sink to cut down on rinsing. I also pulled out the spatula. That is what my mom used to get dishes ready to wash in the days before garbage disposals were the norm.
In the summer we use the dirty water out of the fish tank to water the veggie garden. We run a dehumidifier in the basement in the summer. Water from that goes to watering plants or garden beds.
I have to agree with Donna, Lindsey, Red Rebel and maybe a few others I missed up there. It can be really disheartening to see specific examples of greed and entitlement. But I feel that if you choose to give, you need to hold yourself above the fray a bit and keep your own judgment and cynicism in check as much as you can.
Use your own very best self to give generously to the very best selves of the people you are giving to. At some point, whether you are rich or poor, whether you know it or not, someone has been unselfishly, non-judgmentally generous to you. This is a wonderful force in the universe, and should be nurtured as much as possible.
It doesn't mean buying an ipod. But it means a little cock-eyed optimism and a lot of just letting it go.
This was the first year my husband and I participated in the Angel Tree program by Prison Fellowship (www.angeltree.org)- not to be confused with the program of a similar name run by the Salvation Army. These gifts go to kids who have a parent (or both) in prison. Each gift is limited to a value of $20, and the tag came with a gift suggestion from the incarcerated parent. The parent chooses out of an idea catalog. I really like this program because you can give on behalf of another person who can't be there to give a present to his/her child at Christmas.
I picked up two tags- one for an MP3 player and another for Tinkerbell pajamas. I ended up at Walmart because there weren't any Tink Pjs in the girl's size at the Disney store. I am happy to report that you CAN get an MP3 player (a basic one, no frills), and some great pjs (and a light up shirt) all within budget. If you shop the ads (especially for electronics)lots of good deals can be found...I agree- use those coupons and sales..especially online!
All this to say, I agree- if you want to give, then do so! Find an organization that matches with your values and beliefs about giving. We chose to give this way because we want those kids to know the gift of Jesus is why we celebrate Christmas, and that their parents, although not present in person, care for them too. Finally, I second the previous comment- don't just give at this time of year, give all year, so you can be familiar everything that organization does and understand if that's really where you want the money to go. The more you know, the more confident you can feel about giving through that organization.
I could not agree more with your posts and the commenters.
Esp the one that wrote about Commercials making children want things they cannot afford - we do not own or watch a TV any longer and I find that I want less things now. Now i just have to cut out the internet (as if I could!) and I could cut down on even more
I think much of the success of gathering wild foods is one's mindset and advanced preparation. Although I have a full-time job, I'm a scavenger by nature, and I take advantage of free edibles even though I could pay for them. Living in Oklahoma, I gather the following free and organic foods: pecans, acorns, persimmons, pears, apples, peaches, soy beans, tomatoes and sweet potatoes. I am a commuter biker, and when I ride about my small town, I take note of the trees that bear fruit and nuts. When their fruit is in season, it litters the ground and is so plentiful I have NEVER had anyone object to my stopping and picking some up. In fact, most people are grateful. Also, there are a number of community gardens here that I got permission to glean once the harvest was complete. It's amazing what you can find for free if you simply keep your mind open to the fact that free, organic food IS out there if you dust off and hone your natural gathering skills. It's December 9th, and I'm still eating fresh organic tomatoes that I gathered green when others didn't want to bother with them. Happy Gathering!
I have found out long a go that the stores that offer double coupons are only doing so because they have jacked up their prices higher in the first place. Competitively priced stores do not need to offer extra savings because they already are competitive.
But I have learned another thing about coupons as well. Most of the coupons ae for highly advertised name brand products. These products cost significantly more than a equivalent unadvertised brand does. Over the last few years we have tried out many of these secondary brands and found that they are often as good or better then the name brand products. These products are almost always cheaper then the name brand with a coupon.
The secret to really saving money when shopping is to educate yourself about the prices charged by various stores. Even most grocery chains operate at more then one price point. They will have a fancy store with higher prices on most items and a lower bare bones looking store selling the exact same stuff at lower prices. If you want to save money use those lower priced stores.
Additionally there are often small independent specialty retailers that are very price competitive. Successful small businesses can actually compete against big chains if they focus on selling large volumes of product. In our community I know of at least four small butcher shops that sell better meat at lower prices then any big chain store in town. And each of them treat you better while doing it.
If you want some good free advice on budgeting then check out my website.
Dont forget the classic: placing a 1 liter pop bottle full of water in the upper deck of your toliet so you use 1 liter less with every flush automatically!
The wish list on my building's Christmas Tree shows the same thing. I have participated the last 2 years, but sort through the cards requesting exorbitant gifts that I would consider too expensive for my dear loved ones, and find the child that is asking for small items, items that I can picture the child will cherish. Last year a 15 year old girl asked for a comforter set. This, of course, made me cry and I picked a beautiful set that I hoped she loved. This year, a 5 year old boy is receiving Hot Wheels, Spider Man toys and a ridiculous load of like-new secondhand books.
I guess the old adage that you won't receive what you don't ask for holds true, but I cannot give anyone an Ipod, a DVD player, etc.
I love giving, but I give just as modestly as I live.
I've seen several of these types of events recently, whether it's the names of needy folks on a tree or a community center sponsoring a potluck meal and gift exchange for the needy, where the guidelines say to bring a wrapped gift valued at $10.
Sometimes they specify whether you should bring a child's gift, an adult gift and whether it should be gender specific or unisex. Beyond that, there are no requirements or expections from either the givers or receivers.
I'm more likely to contribute to these events than ones with specific wish list items.
I also prefer to donate food or money to food banks. The idea of a family not having food at Christmas (or any time) is much more heartbreaking to me than them not having gifts.
A guy I work with, father used to char A piece of oak on the grill and then seal it up in A jar of moonshine. He said it smoothed out the flavor and gave it A carmel color like bourbon. Im sure you would want to age it as long as you could stand to.
I agree with Diane above about dishwashers being much more eco-friendly than they used to be.
I agree with you on everything else and do all of the things you mention at least part of the time. Other small helps include using the leftover water and melted ice from our glasses to water plants and saving water from boiling potatoes for bread recipes.
Hubby is less watchful of water usage, so I used to keep a plastic wash pan under the kitchen faucet to catch water that he would otherwise let go down the drain (overfilled ice trays, waiting for water to get cold enough, waiting for water to get hot enough, etc.) I used it to fill my washing machine. I can't do that anymore because I now have a front-loader. After much nagging on my part he's getting better about his water usage and waste.
I've read many of your posts on this subject and I can see both sides of the dime, but, bottom line, shouldn't all children, needy or not, be taught the real reason for the season? I'm not a religious fanatic, but I hate seeing children get so caught up in all the hype and commercialism so young in life. The writer makes valid observations regarding the "big wishing" being a huge turn-off, especially when you're actually having tough times in buying your own kids' gifts. I think it is a better life-lesson (at Christmas or anything throughout the year) to teach children to be grateful FOR WHATEVER THEY HAVE and to realize the season should not be about gifts, but about gratitude and love. So, I agree with the writer, I wouldn't buy a gift like these for these "needy" kids either.
Hi I live in Australia and am now in my 30's. I grew up in the republic of Ireland prior to the tech revolution of the 80's that turned the economy around. We knew a lot of people who got creative with what they had.
Certainly having a vegie garden and growing chicken and geese were among that list. But nothing was wasted, if a goose was butchered the feathers were used for pillows/quilts. A huge room was turned into a studio flat and rented out to a single elderly man. Many people rented out rooms and a sitting room or subdivided homes to rent etc.
Seasonal work was rotated, people joined Choirs and Traditional holidays played a great importance, for free time and family activities.
Even here in Oz, in the eastern states flea markets are very popular.
People holidayed locally.
Families only had one car. We learned to ride bikes, as children.
People had skills such as knitting and sewing. I was taught to knit and sew as part of the primary curriculum.
To summarize I think we are a lazy society but if people before us could do it and thrive so can we. Keep up the brain storming Philip it's a good thing. Michelle
It’s hard for me to see the spirit of the season (generosity) replaced by something else (cynicism?), especially since I’m feeling this way myself lately.
Part of being generous is to give without judgment. You are judging when you decide for someone else what is good for them (or not.)
If you’re giving, you might be giving to someone that hasn’t learned the same financial lessons that you have. They may not spend wisely, they may not save wisely. In fact, that might be part of the reason that they’re in the situation that they’re asking for help.
In other parts of your life, do you feel that it is OK to judge people based on what they’ve learned or not learned? Aren’t there some lessons in your life that took you longer to learn than it should have? Are there people who tried to help you learn those lessons, but you didn’t learn until you were ready to?
These are the things I try to remember when I’m giving. Not everyone has the same background and experiences as I have. Can I judge them for making different decisions than I do, because they’ve learned different lessons?
It doesn’t mean that I give to everyone who asks. I just try to be less judgmental, since I haven’t walked their path. It helps me see more of the generous spirit of the season.
The biggest difference I've personally noticed between other young family members and our own daughter is that our daughter doesn't see commercials. So while my nephew asked his single mother for the $400 (or more!) kiddie dinosaur and/or a PSP, and my husband's young cousin (she's 8) asked for a TV and some Bratz dolls, our daughter asked for a Nutcracker (on sale half off at Macy's!), some candy, and some books. The mall Santa seemed surprised at her requests, and by the fact that she was polite about it.
What I've also personally noticed in my own family is that those relatives of ours (my husband and I) that are not as well-off as we are (and we're really not!) have cable TV, TVs in every room, game systems, all of them smoke (a pricey habit!), and they all eat fast food all the time. When they see something on TV that they WANT, they find a way to pay for it...yet they've never got money for car fixes, or the rent, or the outrageous electric and gas bills. We have saved LOADS of money just by not having TV with commercials. Our daughter has characters that she likes because we'll buy movies or cartoon series' (like, the Smurfs, or Mickey and Pluto, Bugs Bunny, etc), but we mostly make her play with dress-up clothes and her kitchen (that my parents bought her), we read books to her, and we go "window shopping" (where we don't buy anything, but just look) a lot - that's where she got the Nutcracker idea, and a short visit to YouTube allowed her to view the Nutcracker ballet as well.
What I'm getting at with the long-winded post (sorry!) is that these kids are asking for things that they: 1. See on TV commercials, and 2. See other kids have. They probably know they're poor, so they use this opportunity to feel like they're not so bad off, or maybe so they won't be teased, or because they think that EVERY kid whose family has more money has one. But I'll lay most of the blame on the TV commercials from my personal experience.
On dishwashers:
It turns out that the question of which is more green, handwashing versus dishwashers is not exactly straightforward. Sure, if you have a 20 year old clunker, it's not exactly water or energy efficient. But if you have a newer EnergyStar model (post 2003), it is reasonably comparable to best handwashing practice, and beats "handily" sloppy handwashing practice which is more the norm (i.e., letting the water run at high pressure, rinsing instead of scraping food, not using a cold water rinse, etc.) See here for a comparison: http://www.slate.com/id/2189612/
I read somewhere else (EnergyStar's homepage, I think) that part of the secret is more efficient use of water in the newer machines, but also a turn towards heating at the machine, instead of relying on the house's central water heating to get the water temperature up high enough.
It all sure surprised me! I was poised to handwash forever, but I was persuaded that (given my husband's handwashing technique) that the dishwasher was the greener choice.
Yeah, daughter's allergic to pine. But hubby's got multiple chemical sensitivity, especially to petroleum products! One scratch on the arm of the artificial tree and he's on steroids until Valentine's day to combat the allergy! I love my ficus Christmas tree.