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Under Armour Hustle 3.0 Backpack
It's called a backpack, but if you want to wear it on your front or on top of your head or anywhere else we're not going to stop you we're not the backpack cops.
In the Box:
- (1) Under Armour UA Hustle 3.0 Backpack
Apple iPad Air 2 Tablets w/1Yr Warranty
Ok, I just got another iPad Air, so this time I just need to--AW DANGIT. There it goes.
Alright, third iPad Air. I put it in a lead case this time so it should be sufficiently weighed down. Unless I take it out like this--AW CRAP. Well that was dumb of me.
Good thing this iPad Air sale is so cheap...
CordaRoy's Chenille Bean Bag Chair
Other disparate pairs:
- Velvet plungers
- Mink Lay-Z-Boys
- Gold-plated bunny slippers
In the Box:
- (1) CordaRoy's Chenille Bean Bag Chair
Bose Quiet Comfort Headphones - Your Choice
So don't use 'em for any casual, amateur use. You'll injure yourself if you try to listen to advanced Mahler or detailed math-rock. Just stick to the Original Boradway Cast Recording of the Musical Cats. These are BOSE Headphones, after all.
In the Box (QC30)- ships in retail box:
- QC30 Headphones
- Carry Case
- Charging Cable
In the Box (QC15) - ships in retail box:
- QC15 Headphones
- Carry Case
In the Box (QC25)- ships in retail box:
- QC25 Headphones
- Carry Case
- Lightning Adapter
Rowenta Turbo Silence Pedestal Fan
This thing gets quiet so fast, it'll make your head spin!
...wait, that can't be right.
Rowenta 16" Pedestal Fan Dimensions: 18" x 18" x 54"; adjusts in height from 42" to 54"
In the Box:
- (1) Rowenta VU5551 Turbo Silence Oscillating 16-Inch Pedestal Fan
Under Armour Men's Apparel
We tested this armour extensively and it is NOT sword-proof. Please call a doctor.
Mystic Wolf
"Oh my! What sparkly eyes you have, mythical beast!" cried Little Red Morty.
"All the better see you with, my dear" he rumbled.
"And what a fluffy tail and beautiful mountain-scape and impressive tree line you have!"
"All the better to, um..."
And how very 'meta' for a big, howling beast like you to sport a cute little miniature howling beast atop a cliff!"
"...erm...thanks."
Kindle Voyage 6" 4GB Wi-Fi E-Reader
Not that this Kindle contains water or anything else that would help you survive on a long ocean voyage, but it certainly would help take your mind off of the unfortunate circumstances if you ever found yourself lost in the basement. So that's kind of like an voyage.
Specifications:
Model:
Kindle Voyage - Icewine (2014)
Display:
Amazon's 6" display technology with E Ink Carta? and adaptive front light that adjusts automatically, 300 ppi, optimized font technology, 16-level gray scale
System Requirements:
None, because it's wireless and doesn't require a computer.
On-device Storage:
Holds thousands of books; 4GB Internal Storage
Battery Life:
A single charge lasts up to six weeks, based on a half hour of reading per day with wireless off and the light setting at 10.
Elegant Desserts Truffles, 24-Count Box
To be very clear these are the chocolate kind of truffles not the fancy schmancy have to be hunted down in the forest by specially trained pigs kind of truffles. But if we COULD train a pig to seek out chocolate truffles that would be hilarious and adorable.
- Store at room temperature. Do not refrigerate nor freeze product.
Ethan Williams Soft Sueded T-Shirt 3-Pk
The preppers mantra goes "three is two, two is one, one is none" so by that math I'm not entirely sure how many shirts you're buying here, but it's probably enough to fully stock your bunker. You're going to want to have clean shirts in your bunker.
Size Chart (inches)
S
M
L
XL
XXL
Chest
38-39"
41-42"
44-45"
48-49"
52-53"
Body Length
28-28.5"
29-29.5"
30-30.5"
31-31.5"
32-32.5"
Sleeve Length
7.5"
8"
8.5"
9"
9.5"
In the Box: (1) Ethan Williams 3-Pack-Ultra Soft Sueded Semi-fitted Crew Neck or V-Neck T-Shirt
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