Take navel gazing to the next level and gaze into this mind-bending design.
I mean, like, WOAH, amiright???
STEVE: Get it?! It's from this really old movie, "Kung-fu Kid" or something. THERE, who says millennials don't know culture?!
We're not saying this is a Sex Panther... but yeah, it is. I mean come on, look at those sleek lines, that penetrating stare, that hint of musk in the air... I think I have to rethink my stance on dating panthers, again.
In the Box:
(1) EKO 92850-1 9 L DOCOMO Sensor Bin Stainless Steel Trash Can
STEVE: I put it in my desk! Hahahahahhaha {NOTE FROM H.R.: Remove this write-up immediately}
STEVE: Oh god, I tried to use slang and it came out really weak... If anyone from the office is reading this at home, how do you go back and rewrite the Intro section of a product? Hello? Aw, come on, l used "totes" and "rad" in the same sentence...
STEVE: I need to stay sharp if I'm gonna run this whole office today! Oh, ok, I think I'm adjusting to the caffeine now, my heart's stopped pounding and my left arm is so relaxed it fell asleep!
Expiration Date will be at least 2 years out.
In the box:
STEVE: Not that we walk around in our boxers or anything. OH GOD, WE DO, WE TOTALLY DO. What's wrong with me??!?!?!? WHY do I keep admitting things on these write-ups?!?! ...tomorrow is gonna suck so bad when everyone gets back :(Specs
STEVE: Like, anything with cold dead eyes. Like Rick in Accounts Receivable. Haha! SICK burn on Rick when he's not even here! TAKE THAT, RICK! That'll teach him to drink kombucha that is clearly labeled "Intern Steve"
In the box:
STEVE: Yeah, Dipsy Doodles are the best bang for your buck out of the vending machine. I think the extra grease has like more caloric value. You gotta be careful, though. I once ate three bags and a Red Bull and had abdominal distension for like all day. Anyway, don't think of my bloated gut, buy this monitor!
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